One Crazy Life
by celtic mommy
Summary: Bella's life is thrown upside down after a night with Edward, with her best friend picking up the pieces. Letters are written, rejection received. Bella moves on only to come face to face with her past a few years down the road. AH/pretty OOC/M for reason
1. Fuckin more ways than one

**So, here I am with another story that I just can't stop myself from writing. It won't be a super long story…because my attention span won't allow me to write something with more than 20 chapters. For those of you that are reading Tainted Love, the next chapter will be out soon. I promise. I had to get this out of my head before I could finish that story and give it the concentration it deserves.**

**A few things. While I can promise that this is a Bella and Edward story, as well as promise lemons and the typical language associated with my stories…I can't promise that Edward and Bella will have an easy go of things. Just try to hang in there and I think (hope) you will enjoy the story.**

**Disclaimer: Twilight and all characters associated with the series are not mine.**

**ONLY meant for mature audience! I have a tendency to overuse four-letter words and a slightly unhealthy obsession with lemons. Shutting up now.**

*****Chapter 1*****

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." I stared at the little stick on the bathroom counter for the last 10 minutes and it didn't change what I was looking at. Even when I willed myself to hallucinate a different image. Nothing changed the fact that I was now looking at 2 very clear lines.

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." I knew I needed to stop staring at the stupid thing, but my body was against me and would not move at all, save for the minute tilting of my head as I made myself think looking at the stick at a diagonal would change the results. _It didn't work, by the way. Still two lines._

"Bells?" I heard my best friend's voice on the other side of the door and jumped. "Bells. You've been in there for 20 minutes. Is everything okay?" I finally got my head to move enough to turn it toward the door and stare at the only barrier between me and the one person I knew would comfort me in a time like this. The only problem was the fact that I would have to admit to keeping things from the most important person in my life.

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." I just felt like getting that in one more time before opening the door and sharing my biggest secret.

"Bells?"

I opened the door to find my best friend with a deep frown on his face, looking at me with extreme concern. His hulking form stood completely in the doorway and his baby blue eyes searched my face for a reason I seemed to be freaking out. Even without looking at his eyes, I could tell he was seriously worried about me by the look of his dark brown curly hair in messy disarray from him running his hands through it. It was something he only did when worried or upset.

"Hey Em." I attempted a smile at the big oaf, but knew it didn't come close to reaching my eyes. Without saying anything else, I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried myself in his chest. He remained quiet, but completed our embrace by encircling me in his arms and squeezing me tightly.

After a few minutes, I knew his curiosity was getting the better of him. He was beginning to get fidgety and loosened his hold on me slightly. It was enough for me to notice, so I knew it would be time to tell him everything soon.

"Bella honey. Wanna talk about it?" I knew he was wondering why I freaked out earlier today while we were eating lunch and ran out of the apartment mid-meal, only to have him see me running back into the apartment 20 minutes later and straight up to the bathroom.

"Um." I pulled away from him and looked up into his eyes. "I can't say it. Can you just go into the bathroom and look on the counter?" I bit my lower lip when I saw his eyebrows furrow and knew he was beginning to piece everything together.

I stood with my back to the bathroom, still barely in the doorway as Emmett attempted to squeeze his way around me. I counted in my head to see how long it would take him to react to what he was about to see.

"Ewwww!" I whipped around to look at him and jumped out of the way just in time as he ran out of the bathroom.

"Ew? Em? That's all you have to say?" I heard my voice raise in pitch as I questioned him.

"Yeah. Bells. That's pretty fucking disgusting. I fucking picked that thing up." Still not seeing what the big deal was, I rolled my eyes. "I picked it up by the end that apparently you pissed all over." He threw his hands in the air before looking at them, shrieking and running to the kitchen. I followed him and shook my head when I saw him rush to the sink and scrub his hands roughly. In the middle of his third time lathering up his hands with soap, he froze.

"Um. Emmett. You're wasting water." I quickly pointed out to him. Ignoring my comment, he turned to me with wide eyes.

"Wait. You're knocked up?" I would have laughed at him if this wasn't such a serious time for me.

"It would seem that way." I bit my lip waiting for his response.

"Oh." He turned back to the sink, rinsed his hands off and turned the water off before drying his hands with the kitchen towel.

"Oh?" I questioned, still not getting the reaction I expected. He shrugged his shoulders, before sighing and turning to me again.

"Come on." Emmett pulled me to the living room and we sat together on the sofa. "Tell me how this happened."

_-----------------Flashback----------------_

_I continued to slam the shot glasses down as I restocked the bar and berated Emmett in my head. The stupid prick had asked me to come in and help out in his bar, Bar. Yes, he names his bar…Bar. He figured it would be easiest for all the drunks to remember. I have asked his mother if he was dropped on his head as a child, but she insists he wasn't. I'm still not convinced. But, I digress._

_So, I showed up to Bar and got to work filling orders to catch the bartenders up. I thought it odd that Emmett asked me to come in to help when he really wasn't too busy, but I did what I always do when I help out and got the bar caught up with orders and restocking the glasses. That's when Em decided to come out of his office and saunter over to me with a huge ass grin on his face._

"_Thanks for coming in Bella. I'm going to need you to close up. I have a date tonight." Yeah, that's exactly what he said. I was furious. I don't fucking working at Bar. I help out when needed, so I was pissed that he was going to take advantage of that and just tell me that I would be closing his business up for him. But, of course, as always with Emmett, I couldn't say no and just nodded, told him to have a wonderful time and pushed him out the door, calling him names in my head that would make a sailor blush._

_In the middle of my tirade, and my new combo word, "motherfucking-tittie-cunt-douche", when I heard a chuckle coming from behind me. Without turning, because the task of alphabetizing the liquor bottles was very important to me, I hissed in the chuckle's general direction._

"_Something funny assfuck?" I heard the chuckle cease and continued on with my task before hearing a throat being cleared. I rolled my eyes and huffed before turning with an obviously fake smile on my face._

"_How may I help you sir?" I asked sweetly to the douche that apparently thinks I'm quite hilarious. _

_Unfortunately, it wasn't until I finished my sentence in the bitchiest manner possible that I looked at him. I may have been nicer had I seen the fuckhot man sitting on the other side of the bar. His emerald green eyes were dancing with mirth and his mouth was formed in the oddest crooked smirk that only he would be able to pull off. His hair, while one side of me wanted to tell him to fix that shit up, the other part of me wanted to ask how great the sex was to get his gorgeous copper hair into such a state disarray._

"…_.so I apologize." It was then that I realized he was talking, which then took my focus to his mouth. And fuck, I wanted that mouth on my body. I gripped the bar to keep myself from jumping on top of it, spreading my legs and telling him to have at it. I shook my head when I realized he was looking at me like I was crazy._

"_Huh?" Yes, that was my reply._

"_I asked if I could have your name." At that point, I wished I had been paying more attention to him speaking before. His voice was like melted chocolate that I wanted to roll around in, coating my body…and then have him lick off me._

"_Bella." I mentally patted myself on the back for being coherent enough to answer his question. It gave me the confidence to try out a question of my own. "And yours?"_

_He cocked his head to the side and stared at me for a second, almost trying to decide if I was being serious. I decided he must have already told me when I was too busy watching his mouth move to actually listen to the words that were spilling from it, and thought I was completely mental._

"_Edward." He continued to stare at my intently, still seemingly looking for something like recognition. But, he was not going to find it because I was pretty sure I would remember meeting my wet-dream-come-to-life before._

_Two hours later, a few shared shots, and many inane questions like "what's your favorite color" later, I found myself locking up the bar and grabbing Edward's hand to lead him back to my apartment. I found that he was in town for business and his hotel was too far away. I wanted to get laid and my apartment was close by. He didn't seem to mind and willingly followed me._

_When we got to my apartment building, I pulled him right into the waiting elevator and attacked him as soon as the door closed. By the time we reached my floor, he was stripped down to his boxers and I was in just my blue lace boy shorts. From there, we stumbled into my apartment, and quickly got rid of the remaining articles. Seeing his enormous dick spring free of its confines was enough to make me come. In fact, I took a mental picture of the beautiful thing and decided to build a shrine to it in my mind to worship on a nightly basis._

_Before we could even make it past the entryway, I dropped to my knees and hungrily took his cock into my mouth, sucking and stroking like my life depended on it. I was spurred on by his hands tugged on my hair and the "oh shit" and "fuck" and "mmm…bella…so good" coming from his mouth. I hummed, grazed my teeth, swirled my tongue, and swallowed with him deep in my mouth in my effort to give him the greatest pleasure possible. I'm a giver, what can I say. It didn't take long for him to spill into my mouth, which I readily drank like a man stuck in the desert for 5 years._

_Once he came down from his orgasm, he immediately pulled me up and kissed me with everything that he had. I was shocked at the passion coming from him, and felt myself begin to melt. We quickly made our way to my bedroom, where I was thrown on the bed, legs spread, and looking down at the most glorious bronze hair sitting in the middle of said spread legs. With a quick wink, Edward slowly licked my wet folds in one pass before biting gently on my clit. I couldn't stop the loud moan that came out with that action._

_It was my turn to moan out the "oh fuck" and "shit that's good" and "you are a fucking master with your tongue" as he worked my body in ways I couldn't imagine. I felt fingers in many places at once while his tongue worked diligently on my clit, bringing me to the highest high I have ever known. I screamed in my release, reaching down to push his face into me as I came all over his fingers. This action was apparently a turn on for him because he growled and leapt onto the bed like a lion pouncing on its prey._

"_In me. Now" I panted out, still trying to regain my composure after the best orgasm in existence. Without hesitation, he complied and thrust into me in one swift motion, causing us to both moan. His thrusts were rough and fast and I couldn't catch my breath from the overwhelming feeling of having him inside of me. I felt like I was on fire, but in the best way imaginable._

_I think I screamed as I came the second time, after he pounded into my cunt without mercy and hit my sweet spot every time. At that point, I may have begun to speak in Latin. I'm really not quite sure. I just know I was on a whole new level of pleasure and I was determined to never come off of it._

_I'm not quite sure how it happened, but in what seemed like one swift motion, Edward was sitting up with me straddling him, my back facing him, as I bounced on his cock like a pogo stick. In this moment, I thanked the many trips to the gym and my trainer's incessant need to make me do squats. I used every thigh muscle I had to ride him like he had never been ridden before._

_It didn't take long before I felt his grip on my hips tighten and his breathing become so labored I was afraid he was going to hyperventilate. With two more rough thrusts, he violently came, calling out my name over and over again._

_---------------------End Flashback----------------------_

"Really Bells? You really felt the need to go into just graphic detail with me?" Emmett looked at me like I was insane.

"What? I thought it was a good story." I said sheepishly. I knew he hated when I went into detail about my love life, but I thought it was funny to watch him squirm.

"So, what happened after that? And with a little less detail please." He raised his eyebrows at me and I knew I needed to just get on with the rest of the story.

"Okay. So, after the mind-blowing sex, we felt asleep in pretty much the exact position we were in. I think he was even still inside of me." I bit my lip to keep from laughing when Emmett grimaced. "We woke up twice throughout the night to get it on again before I fell into a deep sleep. The next morning, I woke up and he was gone. He must have gotten our clothes from the elevator because my clothes from the night before were sitting on the end of my bed, folded."

"So, he just left?" He questioned me.

"Yep. No note. Nothing. Gone." I shrugged again.

"Okay. So, we need to figure out who this guy is, right?" I could tell Emmett wasn't sure what the next step should be and I knew the next bit of information was going to shock the shit out of him.

"Well, that's the thing. I already figured out who he is." I turned to the coffee table and grabbed the People magazine sitting under a pile of my books. I opened to the dog-eared page and handed the magazine to Emmett, who looked at me like I was crazy before looking at the photo staring right at him.

"Holy fuck." He breathed out.

"Yeah. That's pretty much exactly what I said." I nodded.

"Edward Cullen was the guy? As in People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive?" He looked up from the magazine with wide eyes.

"That would be the one." I nodded.

"Wow. So, Edward Cullen is yo baby's daddy."

* * *

**A/N: Okay. Here's the deal. I read so many stories with Bella getting pregnant by Edward and being a little bitch (sorry to anyone who has written stories like this…because most likely they are in my story alerts) and refusing to tell him. But, I can assure you that this story is completely different.**

**I hope you guys will give this story a chance. Let me know if you think I should continue. Chapter 2 is done and waiting to see the response.**

**Chapter 2: You'll learn about Bella's job and find out how she handles the situation of informing Edward about the pregnancy.**

**Peace out.**


	2. Letters and Ink Stains

**Anyone up for beta-ing this story? PM me.**

**Things I don't own: Twilight and all the gloriousness associated with it**

**Things I do own: Shoes that give me blisters, but I can't stop wearing because they are fucking awesome and a Britney Spears CD because I had a temporary lapse in judgment a few years ago and thought it would be an okay purchase. (At least that's what I tell people when they see it)**

**Chapter 2**

**BPOV**

I made my way into Ink Stains, the tattoo shop I have worked at for almost 4 years, an hour late thanks to my body's desire to bend over a toilet expelling copious amounts of vomit. Yes, morning sickness has reared its ugly head and I was not happy. I really enjoyed the tacos I made the night before, but they were no where near as pleasant the second time. And getting corn stuck in my throat made me rethink ever eating corn salsa again.

Marvin, the shop's owner, was already working on his first client, slurping away on his smoothie while pretending to think about what he would be doing next, when I plowed through the door. Fortunately, I had decided I should eat crackers before leaving the apartment, so I had a great excuse to completely ignore Marvin's death stare and lecture on being on time as I made a beeline to the bathroom. And in case you were wondering, crackers aren't so unpleasant making the trip back up.

Marvin was very supportive of me when I told him I was pregnant. Of course, it helped make sense of my crazy behavior of a few weeks prior to finding out I had an organism growing inside me.

_Flashback_

_The day I found out his identity had been a pretty slow day at work. I was finishing up with a client when a group of giggling sorority girls came in. Unfortunately, Marvin and Jacob, another artist, were busy with clients, so I got the honor of talking with the girls to see what tattoo they were planning on getting. I discreetly mouthed 'roses', Jake shook his head and mouthed 'hearts', Marvin did his typical eye-roll and mouthed 'boyfriend name'. This was always our little bet when girls would come in and try to be badasses getting stupid tattoos they would regret in a few years. The winner got to pick which loser would have to do the tattoo._

_After asking the girls what they wanted, they went into some explanation that there was a bet at the sorority -house and one of them lost…I really wasn't paying attention…so the loser had to get a tattoo of a famous person on them. I rolled my eyes as they shoved a magazine in my face and told me Buffy or Cindy Lu…or whatever, the loser, would be getting a portrait of Edward Cullen on her lower back. Yes, that's right…an Edward Cullen tramp stamp._

_Not knowing who the fucking Edward Cullen douche was, I grabbed the magazine from the girls and forced myself to not roll it up and beat them with it, taking a look at the picture they were all pointing to. And it was at that moment that my world stopped moving. I was staring at a picture of Edward Cullen, who I learned from the skanks was "the most awesomest movie actor of all time", although the article's title just stated he was the "Hunk of the Century"._

_And before you ask, yes, I have been living under a rock for the past, oh 7 years or so. My life has revolved around college and tattoos, so finding out celebrity gossip or even watching movies has not been on the top of my to do list. So, fuck you all for judging me on my lack of celebrity knowledge. If I had known there was a fuckhot guy like Edward making movies, I would have paid more attention. But, I digress._

_I ended up refusing the do the tattoo and telling them all they were a bunch of fucking idiots, before stealing the magazine and telling Marvin I was leaving for the rest of the day. On my way home, I stopped at the store and bought every tabloid, celebrity magazine I could find and read all about the man I had spent a mind-blowing night with._

_End Flashback_

Once I was done with my prayers to the porcelain god, I got to my station and set up for my first client, Emmett. I knew why he decided to set up an appointment for a tattoo and it kind of pissed me off. I was tempted to give him a mushroom tattoo, but knew he wouldn't get it. The reason I would be graced with his presence was due to the fact I had been ignoring him for the last two weeks. At my first sonogram, he decided to tell me that I should contact Edward and inform him of the pregnancy. I was only 7 weeks along and tried to tell him I wanted to wait until at least 12 weeks before even thinking about that decision.

After a fight that caused us my midwife to ask us to leave because we were scaring the other fatties, I gave Emmett the silent treatment. And, honestly, it was the pregnancy hormones making me do that. I completely agreed with him that I needed to contact Edward…I just didn't feel like letting Emmett know that I agreed and then it pissed me the fuck off that he actually had a valid argument.

Rather than admit that I agreed with him, I ignored him and began doing my own research to find a way to contact Edward. The first route I took was fan club websites. Those bitches are crazy and I quickly scratched them off my list of people who have any kind of good information. They may know what time of the day he takes a shit or what his favorite hot pocket was, but they don't have a clue where he lives. What happened to good stalker chicks?

Next, I did research of county records, thinking I would find something from when he purchased his house. Nada. Finally, after I exhausted all of my options, I was ready to give up. The gods were smiling on me that day, though because I overheard Jacob's client talking about a friend who had been sucked into the fine world of the paparazzi. I made up a lame story about how I thought paparazzi were hot and brave to go up against those big, bad actor guys and was able to get the phone number of Mike Newton, Pap extraordinaire. _No lie. That's how he answered the phone._

He was able to provide me with Edward's home address within 2 minutes. Unfortunately, an address was the only information he was able to get. Apparently, big time actor Cullen had some really good people on his team that were able to keep things like phone number, email address, etc way under wraps.

With that information, my next step was to figure out how to go about wording the letter. Somehow I didn't think "Instant Winner! No purchase necessary. You can claim your prize in a little less than 9 months!" would go over very well. So, with that in mind, I decided to let up on the silent treatment and ask Em's opinion of how to break the news to the sperm machine that he impregnated me.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"To Whom It May Concern?" I shook my head. "Dear Edward?" Again, I shook my head. "Sup, my baby daddy?" This time, along with a head shake, I reached up and smacked Emmett on the back of his head.

"Seriously Em? First you make it sound like I'm sending in a resume. I fucking know to whom this issue may concern. It may fucking concern Edward Cullen. And Dear Edward just seems too fucking formal. I won't even comment on your last choice because it will just make me want to punch you." I stopped my work on the tattoo long enough to berate Emmett and started back up as soon as my rant was over.

"Bells. I just wanted to make you smile or laugh or something. Fucking pregnancy hormones are making you a crazy bitch." Emmett stopped talking as soon as I sent him a glare. I don't know why he thought it was a good idea to piss off someone with the ability to permanently ink a penis surrounded by a heart on his arm.

"Just shut your fucking mouth. I've decided I would have better luck asking Marvin and Jacob to help me out. And their suggestion was to just mail him a pee stick with a note that said 'Guess who'." We steered clear of the topic of the letter for the rest of the appointment. I really wanted to finish the sleeve I was doing to him and my brain needed a break from thinking about what I should do.

**************************************

_Edward,_

_I'm really not sure how to go about this letter, but I'm hoping you will read it completely and not just toss it thinking it is just a crazy fan. I can assure you that until very recently I had never even heard of you. I guess I should explain who I am. My name is Isabella Marie Swan, but you know me as Bella. We met not too long ago, well around 2 months, at a bar I was working at. I'm really hoping this is enough to jog your memory because I would rather not go into detail with the vents of that night._

_Anyway, I'm not writing to just catch up on old times. I have some news and I know of no other way to contact you. It took me over 2 weeks to just get this address, so I'm praying this will get to you._

_Below, you will find my contact information. The news I need to give you would probably be best done face-to-face or over the phone at the very least since we are in 2 different states. Please call me or contact me in any way as soon as you possibly can. I guarantee this is of the utmost importance._

_Thank you for reading this and I sincerely hope to hear from you soon._

_Bella_

_****************************************_

It only took me 2 hours to write that little letter and I had to force myself to place it in the envelope before I went for another re-write. I was tempted to put the letter on one of those fanfiction sites and ask for a beta to spellcheck and see if they had ideas for how to write the letter in a more reader-friendly way, but thought that might be going just a little overboard. I wasn't sure if I was being a coward for not telling him in the letter than I was pregnant or what, but I didn't think that was something you should tell a person through the mail.

I just had to hope he would contact me. In fact, I put my faith in him that he would contact me as soon as he received my letter.

_****************************************_

_Edward,_

_I'm guessing the first letter I sent to you either never made it to you, or you decided I was some fucked up chick just trying to get you to call me. Trust me when I say that was not the case. In any event, I feel that I should no longer wait to give you the news I wanted to give you. I continued to have friends research contact information for you, and again this address was what was found, so I am not sure what to make of the lack of response._

_I found out, over four months ago that I am pregnant. This is not the most conventional way of telling someone they are going to be a father, but I really know of no other option. I am sorry I had to tell you this way, but I wanted you to know._

_Now that I have told you, I just want to make a few things clear. I, in no way, planned for this to happen. Also, I can assure you that this child is yours. I know, with the way things happened so quickly the night we met, it may seem that there could potentially be multiple possible fathers. What you must think of me… But, in any event, when we met I had not been with any other man in almost a year._

_I want to explain that I do not want you to feel obligated in any way to be part of this child's life and do not want your money. That's not what this letter is about. I felt you needed to know that you were part of creating a life and I will allow you to do with it what you wish. Please understand that I am fully capable of providing for my child and do not need your help in any way._

_If you would like to be part of your child's life, please contact me at any of the information below. If anything, please just send me any family health history that I should know as someone who is carrying your child. If I don't hear from you, the last correspondence I will send will be upon the birth. After that, you will not be bothered again._

_Bella_

_****************************************_

Can you guess that he never contacted me? I never heard from him after my first letter. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. It is probably ridiculous, but I felt some kind of connection when we were together and I apparently deluded myself into thinking he felt it as well.

I knew it was stupid to get upset over him not contacting me, but I was hormonal and dealing with all the joys of pregnancy, so rational thought was clearly not part of my life at the moment.

After weeks of me constantly staking out the mailbox and hounding our mailman, Emmett sat me down and told me he didn't think I would be getting a letter back from Edward. And then, when I started picking up my phone at random times throughout the day just to make sure it was still working, he staged an intervention. Supposedly I had gone overboard. I told him to fuck himself even though I secretly agreed with him.

So, that's why I decided I needed to just write to him and tell him exactly what the deal was and let him decide what his next step would be. At least, then, I would know I did everything possible to let him know he was a sperm donator and the result of his donation was a shiny new baby.

What I failed to mention was the fact that he was the father of not one, but two babies currently wreaking havoc on my bladder. I knew the news of the pregnancy alone would be shocking. I didn't want to add 'you are getting two for the price of one' to the news just yet. I was going to save that for when he called…

Because, stupid me, I still believed he would.

It was only three months later that I composed the final letter while sitting in the NICU, watching my babies sleep, and realizing I would be doing this alone.

_****************************************_

_Edward,_

_Congratulations! You contributed in creating the lives of two of the most beautiful children on this planet. _

_This is the last time you will hear from me._

_Isabella Marie Swan_

_****************************************_

**A/N: If anyone has a question about the 'mushroom tattoo' comment…go to urbandictionary and look that shit up. And you're welcome for teaching you something new. **

**I'm worried that this chapter might be choppy, but it needed to be done this way to be able to move on. So, I apologize if it is confusing. **


	3. Fast Forward Time

**Special thanks to smmiskimen for giving me the honor of being the beta for this story. I feel so fancy now.  
**

**And if there is anyone reading this story who has not started reading her smutabulous story, Sex Everyday Keeps the Doctor Away, I am giving you a homework assignment. Go read it. I won't require a book report, but give her some love and leave a review to let her know how fucking lovely her work is. There may be a pop quiz later.  
**

**Disclaimer: Twilight is obviously not mine. I have double-checked and there is not one use of the word fuck. So see, not mine. **

**Enough of my bullshit.**

**Chapter 3**

**BPOV**

_**5 years later…**_

"Fuck yes!" I growled as I was relentlessly pounded into, my back pushing into the wet shower wall with each thrust. I threw my head back against the tile wall, not caring that I probably just gave myself a concussion.

"You. Need. To. Be. Quiet." He huffed out between thrusts. His strength still amazed me, the ability to hold me up with one hand, as he groped every part of my body with the other, pounding into me non-stop. _One word: FUCKINGAMAZING!_

I was so close, and as though my clit had held up a neon sign pointing to it, saying "press here", he added just a hint of pressure to my throbbing bud. I grabbed his face and forced his mouth against mine to hold my moans of pleasure as I clenched around his still-thrusting cock. With one last thrust, and a squeak from my back sliding against the wet tile, his movement stilled and his warm cum filled me while he moaned my name against my lips.

He rested his forehead against mine, both of us fighting to get our breathing under control. I sighed when he pulled out of me, being mindful to set me down carefully on my feet. It only took us one time to realize I was not very good with standing in a wet shower, after a mind-blowing orgasm. That trip to the ER was not fun at all.

Just as he began to open his mouth to speak, there was a knock on the bathroom door.

"Mommy?" A chirpy voice called through the door.

"Shit!" I whisper-yelled. I attempted to clean myself quickly while my shower-partner did his best to stay out of my way. Not an easy feat for him.

"Hold on honey. I'm almost done with my shower." I called through the door. "Go ahead and get ready. I'll be out in a second." I rinsed off and jumped out of the shower to give my companion some room to wash himself while I dried off. Stealthily, I opened the bathroom door and peered out to make sure the coast was clear. Even with an en-suite bathroom, it's hard to find any kind of privacy with two 5-year-olds running around.

Once I got ready, I made my way into the kitchen to get coffee ready and start breakfast for everyone.

"Leah! Seth! Get a move on it! We need to eat and be out of here in ten minutes!" I yelled down the hall toward the kids' rooms in hopes that they were both ready to go. It was their first day of school, and I knew they were both nervous about meeting new people.

"Coming mommy. You can stop yelling." Leah came strolling out of her room and into the kitchen in an outfit that clearly displayed her unique fashion sense. As much as I wanted to tell her to change out of her black and white tutu that didn't match the hot pink t-shirt with silver brass knuckles on the front, I couldn't stifle her individuality. At least that's what she was constantly telling me.

"Mother. Did you not iron my Spiderman boxer briefs? I have searched through my drawers, and it goes from Power Rangers to Superman. No Spiderman. So, they have either not been washed or they have been placed out of order and that is just unacceptable." I looked toward the sound of the voice and found Seth standing in the hallway in his terry-cloth bathrobe with his arms crossed over his chest as he awaited my answer.

"First of all. You have got to start talking more like a 5-year-old. Second. They have not been washed yet so pick something else." I gave him one of my mommy-looks as Jake calls it, and pointed to his room in a silent command to go get ready.

The differences between the twins are amazing. Looking at them, it is obvious they are related. Both are tall for their age, having dark brown hair that has a red tint to it if the Sun hits it just right. Their green eyes and long-eyelashes are all any woman ever talks about when looking at them. But, the looks are where the similarities end.

Leah is my free-spirit. She dresses in whatever she feels is appropriate for the day and it always matches her mood. Like today, she must be excited, but wants everyone to know not to mess with her…hence the brass knuckles on her shirt. She hasn't let me help her get dressed since she was three. One day, she started crying and saying "Let me do it!" and that was the last time I had any say in what she wore. Most days it wasn't too bad, so I didn't complain.

Leah is also extremely outgoing. She will strike up a conversation with anyone and tell them her life story in seconds of meeting them. It can be both scary and amusing at the same time. I have the stranger-danger conversation with her almost daily, to which she rolls her eyes and then proceeds to tell me that I need to live a little.

Seth is oil to Leah's water. While, he too, wants to choose his own clothes, his style is very put together. Most days I have to talk him out of wearing a tie. He insists that everything be ironed, right down to his underwear and socks. He is quite anal retentive, sometime sitting for hours organizing things around the house.

Seth is also the only kid I have ever known that begs to go to his piano lessons. One day, I was listening to Dvorak while cleaning the house and Seth declared he wanted to learn to play an instrument. Piano seemed the most useful and I figured it would just be a quick little phase and we would be done with it. But, no. Seth now has piano lessons three times a week at his insistence and practices daily. He is quite amazing.

Seth is extremely introverted, almost to the point of being socially awkward. He is usually the one who starts the stranger-danger conversations with Leah. It's pretty humorous to watch him lecture his twin on the dangers of talking to people she doesn't know. She usually then tells him to piss off. Then I get on to her about her language, which causes Seth to smirk at Leah and stick out his tongue while I continue where he left off in his lecture.

"Mommy?" I was brought out of my musings by Leah's voice.

"Yes honey." I handed them each their plates and leaned against the counter watching my babies eat at the dining room table. It seemed like just yesterday that there were 2 high chairs against that table and I couldn't believe it was time for them to start school.

"Where is Uncle Em? I went into his room this morning and he wasn't in there." Her question caught me off guard and I stared at her for a second while I tried to come up with a reason why Emmett wasn't in his room. Luckily, he appeared and took care of the explanation for me.

"Did you miss me sweetie pie?" He ruffled her hair, causing her to squeal and begin frantically finger combing it. "I was helping your mom out with something in her bathroom." He turned his back to the kids and winked at me, walking over and kissing my forehead.

"Hungry?" I asked him, turning to fill up a plate of food for him while he grabbed himself some coffee.

"Starving. I had a great work out this morning and need to get my energy back." He chuckled as he took his coffee to the table to sit with the kids. I narrowed my eyes at him, setting his plate on the table and received a smirk in response.

The kids knew nothing of the extracurricular activities that Emmett and I partook in and I wanted to keep it that way. Neither of us wanted to them to think our relationship was more than what it really was. He was still my best friend. I was just able to fuck him whenever I wanted.

Emmett was my rock when I was pregnant and stayed by me every time I allowed myself to feel upset that their father would not respond to any of my attempts at reaching out to him. When my babies decided they wanted to come early, Emmett was the one who held my hand and told me everything would be okay. I would have never made it through the 4 weeks they were in the NICU without him and his support. He loved helping me get the hang of breastfeeding. To this day, he says it was one of the highlights of his life. He could have done without seeing two beings come out of my punani, but he loved me waving my breasts in his face all the time. _His words, not mine._

It was around 6 months after the babies were born that Emmett noticed something was off with me. To be honest, I had known for a while that I wasn't feeling like a new mother should, but I didn't voice my thoughts to anyone. Em talked me into going to see a doctor and I was diagnosed with post-partum depression. I felt like a failure because I got pregnant by someone I didn't even know, and then couldn't get him to even acknowledge me or his children. And the fact that they came early had just heightened my feelings of failure.

I really wasn't taking care of myself, even with the doctor's help, and was constantly feeling weak and sick. One day, Emmett came home from shopping, all happy and jumping around acting like the fool that his is. When I questioned his strange behavior, he pulled out a book and handed it to me. He said nothing; just let me read the book title and waited for my response.

_Sex Everyday Keeps the Doctor Away_

When I asked him what the fuck he was thinking, he explained that I needed to read the book because it could be a cure to what was ailing me. I was at the point that I would do anything to not feel like shit anymore, so I read the book from front to back in one day. I was amazed that sex could be the answer to getting me back to normal. It was that night that I propositioned Emmett to test the theory out. He was the safe bet in my opinion. We loved each other as best friends and neither one of us would let sex get in the way of our friendship or make things awkward.

And things were definitely not awkward, far from it. Not only was that the first night I fucked the shit out of my best friend, but it was also the last day that I felt the least bit depressed. Now, instead of visits to a therapist, I have sex therapy with Emmett. It's just a good thing I don't have to pay him by the hour. I would be broke. The best part is that neither one of us has let it change our friendship and, we have surprisingly been able to keep it from the kids.

A loud knock at the door pulled me from my thoughts of Emmett and I rushed to the door knowing who it would be. Opening the door, I was face to face with a grown-up version of Leah. I groaned and rolled my eyes as I stepped aside for Alice to flounce in.

"Morning Alice." I grumbled, not ready to deal with her perkiness so early in the morning.

"Where are they? Why aren't you video-taping this? Your kids only have their first day of school once!" I didn't even bother to look at her while she rambled because I knew all of her movement would make me dizzy and possibly puke.

"Chill bitch. Emmett is in charge of taking pictures. I'm sick of being behind the camera. Their baby book has one picture of me. And that's with my legs spread open and me giving the camera the finger." I motioned for her to follow me to the kitchen and resumed my post at the counter.

"Auntie Alice! You look hot!" I shook my head at Leah's approval of Alice's outfit. It was obvious they were shopping together when the outfits were purchases since they were exact replicas. How a 28-year-old woman could possibly get away with wearing a tutu matching a 5-year-old child was beyond me, but somehow Alice could pull it off.

"Okay. Now that everyone is here and little bellies are full, let's do pictures and get this show on the road." Emmett jumped up from the table and grabbed his camera. We took pictures of the kids pretending to walk out the door with the book bags on, then with me as I cried over each one of them being so grown up. Of course, Alice and Leah insisted on pictures of their matching outfits. And finally, Alice took a picture of me and Em with both kids. It was one I would definitely be framing.

We dropped the kids off at school, each of us crying and blubbering like complete idiots and taking more pictures. In fact, I am sure my kids are now going to get their asses beat for being raised by a bunch of pussies. Good thing the little fuckers are absolutely gorgeous, tall and have mad skills in Tae Kwon Do. _What? My kid plays piano and uses a pocket protector. If that doesn't have "come beat my ass" written all over it, I don't know what does. He needed to be able to protect himself._

Finally getting our emotions under control, we split up to go to work. Emmett still had _Bar_, which had risen to extreme popularity thanks to the number of celebrities that had begun to frequent it. The one that we always wished would show up after 5 years was probably the one celebrity that had not stepped foot in the place. Even though Emmett could afford to buy his own house, he refused to leave me and kids alone and made sure we knew how much he enjoyed living with us.

My life had changed drastically since having the twins. About a year after they were born, the owner of Ink Stains, Marvin, decided he wanted to open up another shop and asked me to become his partner. I would be in charge of the current shop while he worked on recruiting for and opening the new place. I was ecstatic and immediately agreed. Now, 4 years after the agreement, the shop was pretty much all mine and Marvin was on his way to opening his fourth shop. His shops were known for having the best artists and he often appeared as a guest artist, which always brought in crowds. He is a master!

Ink Stains was still the most popular and I like to think it is because of me and my artists. After Marvin left, I had to hire a new artist to take his place. Enter Alice.

I had heard a lot about an "evil pixie that kills it with the ink" and was able to get in touch with her. Luckily she was looking for a new shop and agreed to stop by and check us out. When she walked in wearing a t-shirt reading "I'm what Willis was talking about" with black booty shorts and rainbow thigh-high socks, Jake begged me to hire her.

Her portfolio was beyond impressive and as I looked through it, she began to unpack her things and organize her inks at an empty station. Seeing my confusion over what she was doing, she just shrugged and said "oh, like you aren't going to ask me to be part of the team". And that was Alice's first day working at my shop.

Jake was beyond thrilled to have Alice working with us. The big lug was a giant compared to her and had a giant-sized crush on her. Unfortunately for him, Alice only likes the pussy. At least that's what we found out after she wore a shirt stating "I eat out on the first date" on her second day on the job.

Luckily, Alice tones down her choice in attire now that she is a prominent figure in my kids' lives. Now, she just likes to go shopping with Leah and get matching t-shirts.

By the time Alice and I arrived at Ink Stains, Jake was already there working on a large back piece he would be doing in the afternoon, grumbling over how he was sick of drawing flowers. The overall design was a take on his female client's wedding bouquet, which happened to be quite large and contain multiple varieties of flowers. With Jake's ability, he would easily make it look like there were real flowers lying on her back.

Alice went to work straightening all of our books up and getting the front of the shop looking perfect and I went to my office to answer some emails. The only thing of any importance was an email from Marvin stating he would be dropping by the shop this morning and had a huge surprise for me. I glanced at my watch and knew we had at least an hour before Marvin would arrive. A morning person, he is not.

I was right and found Marvin strolling into the shop around 11 just as I was finishing up a sketch for my noon client. It was obvious he was excited about something because he was smiling, something he never does.

"Bella, I need to talk to you in your office." He jerked his head in the direction of the office as he walked past me without acknowledging Jake or Alice. I immediately followed, wondering what could possibly have him acting so oddly.

"I have some fucking awesome news and I am going to go crazy if I have to wait any longer to tell you what the fuck is going on." He stated, plopping down onto my couch.

"Then get on with it assface." I waved my hands in front of him in a circular motion to get across that he needed to get on with it. The use of his nickname was just out of love.

"Remember that bitch I was telling you about that I was forced to tattoo at that convention a few months ago?" He waiting for my affirmative reply and I nodded urging him to continue. "Well, get this shit. She works for a big movie studio and called me up last week. Apparently she liked my work and asked me to send her some photos of my work as well as some of my artists. I sent bits and pieces of Alice's and your portfolios, as well as my best shit."

I huffed and sat on my desk realizing this was going to be a long-ass story and wanting to get comfortable.

"Someone is wearing their bitch pants today, I see." He remarked.

"Fuck you, fucker. Get on with it. I have shit to do." I rolled my eyes and tapped my nails on the desk.

"Anyway. So, I got a call last night that she wants to work with us on a new movie that will be filming here. They need us to do realistic tattoos on the actors for the movie. She and the director will be stopping by tomorrow to go over the details, contracts, and all that fucking jazz." He ended with a slap to the couch and a huge smile on his face. "We're going to be fucking famous!"

"Okay. I would like to request that you never smile like that again. It's just unnatural for your face and quite frankly, a bit creepy." I motioned to his face and shuddered. "And is this a done deal? Do I have no say in the matter? Being famous isn't really something I want for me or my kids, you know."

"Well, yes it is a done deal. I already agreed to it. And no, you have no say in the matter." He glared at me.

"Well, alrighty then." I jumped from the desk and began to walk to the door of my office. "Looks like we have a big meeting tomorrow." Marvin followed me out of the office with that creepy smile and a bounce to his step. The last time he was like this was the time he was able to successfully pull a Houdini on one of his sluts.

"Well, gorgeous, I'm out of here. Places to go, people to do." He tipped his imaginary hat and waved at Jake before walking to Alice and hugging her from behind. And in true Marvin fashion, he did a quick dry hump into her ass and pulled away from her before she could retaliate.

"Watch it fucker. I'll rip that thing you call a penis off and have if stuffed and mounted on my wall." She turned to point her finger at his crotch and glare at him.

"How about I mount you against your wall? I'll show you what you are missing with all that carpet munching you do." He blew her a kiss and winked while Jake and I just shook our heads at their normal banter. I swear one day Alice is going to take him up on his offer just to have more ammo to use against him.

"No thanks. Already had breakfast this morning. Not in the mood for spotted dick." She fluttered her eyelashes at him and turned back to her station while Jake and I burst out in laughter. Marvin left, shaking his head at his loss of that round with Alice.

With that, we started our day. After back-to-back clients all day, I went home exhausted and eager to hear about the twins' first day of school.

**A/N: I really hope you liked this chapter. This will begin to pick up in the next one. I love hearing everyone's theories on what's going to happen. So far, no one has come close and it makes me happy that I may actually shock some peeps.**

**Now remember, before you do anything else (even if you have to feed your kids or do the laundry), go to smmiskimen's profile and check out her stories...especially Sex Everyday Keeps the Doctor Away.**


	4. Movie People

**Sorry for the delay in posting a new chapter. Real life and all that jazz...**(do jazz hands and belt out that last bit a la _Chicago_...it's a good effect)

**Muchas gracias to smmiskimen for being a wonderful beta and getting this chapter back to me so freaking quickly. She's lightning fast people. You better go read her fuckgasmic fanfic, _Sex Everyday Keeps the Doctor Away_! And then once you have completely fallen in love with the story, give her some reviews and tell her how awesome she is.**

**So, I've wasted enough of your time. I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine nor does it belong to anyone I know. Although I do know someone that looks like SM if it's really dark and you are only looking at their profile.  
**

**Chapter 4**

**BPOV**

"Shit fuck!" I yelled out as I pulled my hand quickly away from the muffin pan I had just pulled out of the oven, only to have it slip off the counter and fall loudly to the floor. "Cock suck!"

"Mother! Such language is not appropriate around minds that soak everything up with a sponge." I turned to see my son standing in the doorway to the kitchen with his hands on his hips as he lectured me. "Seriously mother, those words could be repeated in the wrong company and it would only be a reflection on you."

"Well, then I guess it is a good thing that you know better." I raised an eyebrow at him.

"It wasn't me I was talking about." He mimicked me with a raised eyebrow. "Uncle Em is very impressionable."

"And you are precocious." A sleepy voice said from the hallway.

"Uncle Em! You are using your word-of-the-day calendar aren't you?!" Seth beamed at Emmett when he appeared. Emmett narrowed his eyes as Seth, but neither could stop the grins that spread on their faces.

"I'll have you know that the word for today is roborant. As in I am always in need of a roborant after spending time with you." Em ruffled Seth's hair before turning to face me. His eyes widened when he saw the mess on the floor and me sucking on my fingers.

"What happened, B?" He rushed over and bent to pick up the fallen muffin tin.

"No! Don't touch that! It's hot!" I waved him away before he could burn himself as well. He changed course and went to the freezer to get some ice for my fingers.

"Here sweetie. Go sit down and I will get this cleaned up." He gently pushed me to the table where Seth was now sitting, working on a crossword puzzle.

"Seth, honey. You do know you are only 5, right?" I questioned him. He looked up and rolled his eyes.

"You are so silly sometimes mother. Of course I know I'm 5." He shrugged. "I can't help it that I'm smart."

"And modest." Em piped in, turning to wink at us.

There were times I was worried about Seth. He was so much smarter than any other child I had met his age. He learned to read almost as soon as he learned his letters. It was scary how bright he truly was and I was concerned it would hinder his social development. Luckily, with Leah as his sister, my little social butterfly made sure he had friends.

_Speaking of Leah…_

"Leah!" I yelled down the hall. "You need to be ready soon! We need to leave for school!"

Leah came rushing out of her room in her bathrobe, looking around frantically.

"What's wrong baby?" I asked her, cocking my head to the side.

"Is Aunt Alice here yet?" She looked further into the kitchen.

"No honey. She should be here soon, though." I looked at her, waiting for her to explain her panicked expression.

"She is bringing something over that was delivered to her house yesterday. I want to wear it today, so I can't get ready until she is here." She rushed out in one breath.

"Oh. Well, okay. Sit and have breakfast and she should be here by the time you are finished." I motioned to the table and went to get everything on plates for their breakfast, minus the muffins. The four of us sat together like the strange little family we were and talked about what the kids were looking forward to for the second day of school.

"There's this boy. I think he's my boyfriend. We hugged and I told him I want him to kiss me." Leah was going on and on about some boy she met during recess that was from a different class while Seth continuously rolled his eyes at everything she said. Once she decided to focus on her breakfast, I turned my attention to Seth.

"So, honey, are you excited about today?" I asked, giving him a big smile.

"Not really. I think my teacher was born before the dinosaurs and she spits when she talks." He answered with a shrug while rearranging his fruit on his plate by size.

"We'll get you a poncho to wear to class." Emmett told him and ruffled his hair, something Seth absolutely hated.

"Honey I'm home!" A voice carried through to the kitchen and Leah jumped up to greet our guest, squealing.

I didn't get a chance to say a greeting of my own before I saw two figures move quickly past the kitchen doorway and to Leah's bedroom. The door slammed and I looked at Emmett with wide eyes. When they didn't allow me to see the outfit before Leah put it on, I knew we were in trouble.

Ten minutes later, while I was cleaning up the kitchen, I heard Leah's door open and the chatter of her and Alice. I braced myself for the crazy outfit of the day and turned just as the two walked into the kitchen.

"Ta-da!" Leah exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air and twirling around. Alice stayed by her side, jumping up and down, clapping and doing this strange, high-pitched laugh that made me want to look into getting her committed.

"Best shirt ever!" Emmett exclaimed. I just grinned and shook my head at her silliness.

Although the outfit was, surprisingly a simple jeans and t-shirt combo, the blue shirt had traditional tattoo designs scattered all over, with "My Mom's Tattoos are Better Than Your Mom's" in the center in a bold black.

"We found it online the other day when we were doing our weekly shopping for awesome shirts and Leah insisted that she had to have it." Alice announced proudly. "We also bought a shirt for Seth, but I wasn't sure if he would want to wear it." She looked at Seth with her puppy dog eyes and I was amazed that even a 5-year-old that could pout with the best of them fell for her look.

"Let me see it Aunt Alice." He stuck his hand out and waited for her to hand his new shirt over.

He unfolded the black shirt she placed in his hand and tilted his head to look at it, a slow smile spreading on his face. He started to outright laugh and turned the shirt to show Emmett. I walked over to see the shirt and couldn't help the giggle. It was perfect for my little man – written in large white letters was "Jenius." That's right. My spelling freak of a child received a shirt with genius misspelled. I was absolutely shocked when he quickly changed into his new shirt without even worrying about the fact that it wasn't ironed, but there was no way I was pointing that out to him.

"Alrighty. Now that's taken care of, we need to get going. I have an appointment with Tanya this morning and I don't want to be late." Alice started handing the kids their book bags and taking control of everything as usual. "You know how freaked out Jake gets when he is left alone with her."

We quickly got the kids out and delivered to school. I am proud to say it was a tearless goodbye this time. At least that's what Emmett claims, but I am pretty sure I saw him wipe a tear from his eyes when Leah shrieked and ran to Quil, her 'boyfriend'.

The three of us made our way to the shop afterwards, Emmett deciding to join because he can't miss seeing Tanya.

Tanya.

There aren't words in the English language that describe the insanity that is Tanya BoBanya. I know what you are saying…_BoBanya? What kind of last name is BoBanya?_ She apparently heard her niece singing the name game song and thought it had a nice ring to it, so she changed her name from Denali to BoBanya a few years ago. Her middle name, you ask…Tanya…making her full name Tanya Tanya BoBanya.

The craziness didn't stop there. Tanya loves tattoos, which is great for business. Unfortunately, she likes to design her own tattoos and won't allow the artist to put their own spin on it. She brings in her design and that's what is done. No changes allowed.

I first met Tanya during my first month working at Ink Stains. I was new and trying to get a client base, so I was willing to take her when she came into the shop. I couldn't imagine the tall strawberry-blond woman standing before me would want anything more than a simple rose or heart and knew it was going to be a cake walk. She then stated she just broke up with her boyfriend and wanted needed me to rework the tattoo she had of his name. While explaining this, she unbuttoned her jeans and began to shimmy them slightly off to show her hip. That's when I saw the tattoo, or should I say tattoos, consisting of multiple men's names, each crossed out. She pointed to the one name that was not crossed out and said she just needed me to tattoo a line through it.

A few weeks later, she was back in asking me to add a new name to her hip tattoo and I did it. I'm not even sure the name was healed when she returned and asked if I could go ahead and put the line through it. At that time, I let her know I would no longer be tattooing names on her.

From that point on, the tattoos ranged from drawings her niece and nephew did, the playboy bunny symbol under her ear, her ferret's portrait, and various sayings. I was fed up with dealing with her by the time I hired Alice, and she happily took over stating that Tanya doesn't wear panties, giving Alice a great view of her snatch. _Alice's words. Not mine._

Tanya was already waiting for Alice by the time we got to the shop. Alice smirked when she saw Jake cowering in his station, watching Tanya with wide eyes, and mumbled "pussy". The ever-oblivious blonde, was bent over the counter, blabbering away about who-the-fuck knows, giving Jake a great view of her cleavage and the rest of the world a view of her completely bare ass.

"That's what I'm talkin' about!" Emmett exclaimed and Alice gave him a high-five while they stood at the door far too long enjoying the view.

"Hey guys! I was just telling Jakey Poo that I can't wait for the tat I'm getting today." Tanya jumped up, causing one of her tits to pop out of her top. Alice jumped at the change to run over and helped her get her chest situated again.

"Thanks Ali. The girls just wanted to say Hi." Tanya giggled and eyed Emmett as per her usual. "Hiya Emmie."

"Hi Tan-Tan." Tanya hated the nickname and Emmett couldn't stop himself from using it since she felt it her duty to give everyone else a fucking moronic nickname.

Tanya huffed and turned to Alice with a huge smile. She pulled a piece of paper out of the front of her skirt and unfolded it to show her latest tattoo idea. Emmett leaned down to whisper in my ear.

"Ten bucks says Alice keeps that paper and puts it in her night stand to sniff while she masturbates." I felt myself vomit while I tried not to think of where Tanya was keeping that piece of paper. There were obviously no pockets in her skirt.

I left everyone to do their thing, saying a quick hello to "Jakey Poo" and went to my office to get ready for the meeting with the movie people. I wasn't sure if they would want to see more of my work, so I pulled together my portfolio and made sure my favorite pieces were showcased. I printed off a few new pictures of tattoos I finished recently that I was quite proud of.

At 10 o'clock, I was at the front of the shop, making sure everything looked nice for the meeting when Marvin strutted in with a shit eating grin on his face.

"Hey man! What's got you smiling like that?" Emmett asked from his spot laying on one of the sofas we have at the front of the shop.

"Hey Em!" Marvin gave him a man hug and smirked when answering the question. "Remember those twins I was telling you about?" Emmett nodded. "Well, last night they decided to make a Marvin sandwich. And let's just say they were starving."

"Seriously dude?" Marvin nodded in confirmation. "You are the fucking man." Emmett giggled like a schoolgirl, always one to encourage Marvin's antics. I scoffed, bringing Marvin's attention to me.

"Oh, hey wifey." He gave me a nod and wink, causing me to roll my eyes. "Got everything nice and spiffy for our guests this morning?"

"Don't fucking ever say spiffy again. That's just creepy." I shivered, not even commenting on him calling me wifey. He loved to tell everyone we were married, but have an open relationship because I know he's just too much man for one woman. _What the fuck ever._ "And yes, everything is ready for the movie peeps."

"God damn it. Why does the place smell like ass all of a sudden?" Alice yelled from her station, head down in Tanya's crotch. I don't think she was even doing the tattoo anymore.

"Oh yay! My lover is here!" Marvin clapped and rushed over to Alice for a bit of banter. I swear, one day she was just going to call him on his bluff and offer to fuck him. He wouldn't know what to do with himself.

"Nervous?" I looked down at Emmett, who patted the sofa next to him.

"A little." I shrugged. "It's just weird to think that, as a tattoo artist, I am being asked to do something for a big movie. Just not something I ever imagined as a possibility."

"Here's the deal beauty. You are fucking amazing. They are coming to you because they want the work to be professional and look perfect." He placed his big arm around my shoulder and squeezed. "You are going to be a big name when everyone sees your work. This place is going to be bigger than that tattoo place in Miami. What's the name of that place?"

"Um. Miami Ink?" I gave him a look. "Really Em? You couldn't remember the name of a tattoo shop in Miami named Miami Ink?" I shook my head at him.

"It's not fucking important. What is important is the fact that you are the best tattoo artist I have ever seen and need to cut it out with the nervousness. It could cause you to have an anxiety attack." He looked at me worriedly before his expression changed to one of mischief. "Although, maybe that's a good thing. I need to check the book, but I think I know a good way to help with anxiety."

"Em, we don't have time for even a quickie." I snuggled into him. "But you can definitely help me with my anxiety later."

We sat for a little longer before Emmett decided he needed to get to the bar to check inventory, leaving me with Marvin flirting with Alice, Alice telling him to fuck off while she flirted with Tanya, and Jake just hiding out in his corner hoping Tanya would forget he was there. She already had his name tattooed on her inner thigh, telling him she was just being proactive.

At the exact moment I realized the craziness surrounding me, DMX _Party Up _started blaring out of the shop's sound system. I laughed, and couldn't stop myself from dancing and singing along with him. And because my life is so fucking insane, I was in the middle of doing some old school hip hop moves I learned from _So You Think You Can Dance_ and belting out "Ya'll gonna make me lose my mind…up in here…up in here" when the door chime indicated someone entered the shop.

Turning, I found that it wasn't just one person who entered, but a group of people, all staring at me with wide eyes. My eyes quickly glanced at the clock to see it was 11 o'clock…which meant these would be the movie people. I called out to Marvin and reached over to turn the music down before greeting the group in front of me.

"Hi. I'm Bella." I waved and looked behind me to see Marvin slowly strolling up to the front of the shop. "And that is Marvin." I pointed my thumb in his direction.

"Hi Bella. Marvin." An intimidating guy, slightly larger than Emmett stepped forward. "I'm Felix. I'm the Director and my entourage is made up of assistants and makeup people that will be working closely with you." He waved his hand behind him, not bothering to actually introduce specific people. I figured we would officially meet them later. "Rosalie should be in soon. She's outside with the actors, telling them to stop being whiny little bitches and get their asses in here."

"Um okaayyyy." I wasn't sure what to say to him, so I just looked at Marvin and shrugged.

"So, you have a couple divas for us, I take it." Marvin smirked, like he knew what he was talking about.

"Oh, just wait. They are convinced there are going to be mobbed by fans when they come in here and wanted us to guarantee their bodyguards would be able to protect them." Felix chuckled. "I tried to tell them we haven't divulged their identity, but they are convinced this is a conspiracy or something."

"That's fine. Have someone go out and tell the douchebags that if they don't get in here now and stop wasting my time, they are going to have 2 male unicorns fucking as one of the tattoos I put on them." I sneered. I turned on my heel and began to head to my office when the door chimed again.

"See assholes. There is no one fucking here." I heard a smooth female voice exclaim. "No one wants to see you fucktards." I laughed loudly and turned to see the face that went with the voice. A tall, gorgeous blonde pushed her way through the crowd and I think I saw someone actually fall down. I watched the beauty with wide eyes as she looked around the shop appreciatively.

"You must be Bella." She walked up to me more graceful than anyone I have ever seen before. Sticking out her hand, she introduced herself. "I'm Rosalie Hale."

"Yep. I'm Bella." I reached out and shook her hand. "It's nice to meet you."

"That's nice of you to say." She smirked. "But, I'm sure you will be saying differently by the end of this little production." She nodded to Marvin, who was surprisingly quiet, obviously intimidated by the model-like woman in front of us. "So, let's get this show on the road and figure out what's going to be happening." She clapped her hands and whistled loudly. "Here boys." She yelled, as though she was calling her dog.

I stared at her, confused for a second, before realizing there was movement behind her. I looked back to the group, still standing in front of the fucking door and saw them begin to part in what appeared to be slow motion. I looked back at Marvin, and noticed that Alice, Tanya and Jake were all now staring at the front to see who would be appearing.

"Bella Swan?" I saw Alice's eyes widen when a smooth voice said my name. I immediately knew the voice and turned quickly to see a familiar face, shock causing me to stand still for a moment. Marvin poking me in my ribs caused me to jolt out of my surprised state.

"Jasper fucking Whitlock?!" I exclaimed, not even caring about everyone else around me. I was too focused on the tall man with sandy blonde hair now standing next to Rosalie. "What the fuck are you doing here?" I rushed to the handsome man and hugged him tightly.

"Shit Bella. I heard them saying your name, but never would have pegged you as a tattoo artist." Jasper wrapped his arms around me and held me tight. "You do remember passing out just at the thought of blood typing in Biology senior year, don't you?" I smacked his arm and huffed.

"Shut it, fool. I obviously got over it." I pinched him and he yelped, rubbing the spot on his arm that I got him.

"Would anyone like to share with the rest of the class?" Marvin finally found his voice and scoffed, probably from me actually being nice to someone.

"I know Miss Bella here from high school." Jasper answered, looking down at me, with his arm around my waist. The wink told me he didn't feel the need to give any additional information. What he was leaving out was the fact that we were high school sweethearts. We lost our virginities to each other and were together until he decided he needed to go into acting. I supported him and willingly pushed him to go to his first audition.

Our split was amicable and we kept in touch for a while. Unfortunately, we had not spoken to each other in years due to his very busy schedule. I kept up with him through magazines and interviews, but never thought I would ever see him again.

"Shit! Wait until I tell Em about this!" I exclaimed. "He is going to fucking jizz in his pants when he sees you." I went to say more, but was interrupted by a loud throat clearing. I turned to the direction the rude noise was coming from, intent on telling the person off. It was at that moment that my world stopped.

"Hello Bella." His voice had not changed, but I knew that from my obsessive tendency of watching every single one of his interviews. He also looked the same…again not a surprise due to my habit of buying every magazine and movie he had appeared in.

"Well fuck." I whispered.

* * *

**A/N: I would love to see some reviews. I have been in a funk lately and reviews would cheer me up ever so greatly. I'm not one to bribe, but since it seems to be working on my kids and getting them to act better, I think I'm going to reverse my stance on the whole bribery thing. Now, I'm thinking ice cream sundaes wouldn't work with you guys (although you are more than welcome to stop by and have one if you review)...so, how about I guarantee that the next chapter will be up as soon as I get 20 reviews for this chapter. That's not asking for much, is it? **


	5. Havin' a Bad Day

**Thank you to everyone for your reviews for the last chapter. You surpassed my goal of 20 quite quickly and made me so happy. ****I really did plan to have this chapter out last weekend, but got news of a good friend's death and it just threw me. But enough about me. Let's get to the story.**

**Oh, before I forget. My dear reader, youngandmature, asked whether Edward or Emmett was the best sex Bella has had. It's a tough call. At this point, I'm going to have to say Emmett. Just for the mere fact that she only got a personal appearance by Edward's junk once. And she has been with Emmett for years and getting it good and hard quite frequently.**

**Chapter 5**

**BPOV**

"B. I really think you need to slow down." Emmett put his hand around my wrist before I could tip back my next shot.

"Fuck that. I had a shitty day and you are going to let me forget all about it by drinking myself stupid." I narrowed my eyes at him daring him to deny me liquor. "What kind of fucking bar owner are you, telling me I should stop drinking?" I scoffed.

"One that wants to take care of his best friend." He raised his eyebrows at me. "Plus, you don't pay for your drinks, so cutting you off is actually good for business." He turned to my bar companion and began to have some kind of freaky silent conversation with her with just his eyes.

"I don't know what to tell you big guy." Alice shrugged. "The movie peeps, as Bella calls them, came into the shop and she freaked out. It was some sort of freaky reunion that she seemed to enjoy at first, then got all sulky and ended up telling Marvin to go fuck himself by the end of the meeting." I couldn't stop the laughter that burst loudly from my lips.

"Okay. As wonderful as I think it is that you said that to Marvin, I need you to tell me what happened today." Em leaned down to my eyelevel. "You haven't had a freak out like this in years and I need to know what is causing it to be able to help you."

"You are the bestest friend of girl could have, my sweet Emmett." I gushed. "How come no one has taken you away from me, yet? You are such a fucking catch." He gave me a huge smile. "Not to mention you have a fucking huge cock."

"Damn it woman. Inside voice!" Alice smacked me on the back of the head, while looking at all the people who were apparently staring at us now. _Oopsie. Forgot that I get a little loud when I get alcohol in my system._

"Alright." Em stood up straight. "Here's the deal. You are on water and coffee for the rest of the night. The kids are with Demetri tonight, right?" I nodded.

"Yep, they wanted to spend the night to be able to get an early start for the trip to the zoo tomorrow with Uncle Cauis and Aunt Demetri." I confirmed and tried to sneak the bottle of tequila back in my direction, only to be thwarted in my mission by a little pixie.

"Fine." I huffed and crossed my arms over my chest. I gave Emmett a sly smile when I saw his eyes dart to my chest at this action. "Wanna go to your office, Em?" I smirked, thinking he would easily give in.

"As much as I want to say fuck yes to that, don't change the fucking subject. I need a recap of your day from the moment I left the shop." He put his large hand over mine and I knew he wouldn't let this shit go, so I heaved a heavy sigh and let it all out.

"After you left, I took a look around the shop and realized that I live in some kind of fucked up world. I mean seriously, how many places can you find an evil little pixie lesbian with her face in some chick's crotch, while a horny pervert watches and tells the pixie how much he wants her to ride him like there's no tomorrow? And while the pixie is trying to get a meet and greet set up between her tongue and the chick's pink taco, the chick does everything in her power to get the attention of a huge Indian trying to become invisible." I shook my head and then realized I shouldn't do that with the amount of alcohol in my system. "Anyway, so my point is my life is one crazy scene out of some stoner movie. And at the moment that I came to that realization, DMX comes through the speakers, so I started getting down to the music."

Emmett cut me off with a wave of his hand. "I'm going to have to ask you to get to the point already. If we keep going at this rate, the kids will be graduating college by the time I find out what happened." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Whatever. As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted." I glared at him. "I was getting down with my bad self, dancing my heart out, when the movie peeps showed up. There was a huge ass group of people standing in the doorway to the shop watching me show off my mad dance skillz. That's skillz with a z because I'm so fucking badass."

"Holy shit woman! Fuck this. I'm taking over the story." Alice yelled at me. I shrugged because I thought I was doing a pretty good job relaying the events of my day, but if she thinks she can do better, then so be it. _I'll just put my head down for a second._

"So, Bella embarrasses herself in front of all of the people from the studio. It was just the crew and the director. The director, this scary looking gorilla of a man, introduces himself as Felix and they chat a bit while waiting for the stars of the movies to make their entrance. Apparently they were being diva douchebags extraordinaires, so they were taking their sweet ass time coming in the shop.

The door finally opens and some fuckhot blonde comes barging through the crowd, introduces herself and then one of the actors greets Bella. And it was someone she knows."

"Fuck." I snapped my head up when I heard Emmett swear. His eyes were wide as he looked at me. I shook my head.

"It was Jasper." I smiled, thinking of my Jazz.

"As in high school Jasper?" Em questioned.

"Yep, as in Most Likely to be a Movie Star Jasper." I confirmed.

"Oh man. I thought you were going to say it was…." Em shot a look at Alice. "some other actor." Alice didn't notice that he seemed relieved and went on to finish the story.

"Yeah, yeah. We'll get back to the Jasper thing later. I will need to get more information on him. He's on my list of men I would go straight for. Well, at least bi. If there is such thing as a pretty peen, I bet he has one." Alice looked off dreamily and I just put my head back down, waiting for her to continue.

"Okay. Enough of that. So after the little reunion, the guy who is apparently the lead actor in the movie decides he has been ignored long enough and makes his presence known." Alice pauses for dramatic effect, I'm sure. "And it seems our dear sweet Bella knows this one, too."

"Well, fuck." Emmett exclaims.

"Yeah, that's what Bella said when she saw him. And by him I mean Edward Cullen." Alice whispered the last part, I'm sure to make sure anyone that could hear our conversation wouldn't hear that part.

_Flashback_

"_Hello Bella." Edward said._

"_Well fuck." I whispered._

"_Don't tell me you two know each other, also." Rosalie said, exasperated._

"_Um. Yes. We knew each other briefly a few years ago." Edward said, not taking his eyes off me._

"_5 years, 11 months ago if you want to get technical." I said through clenched teeth, narrowing my eyes at him. I broke our stare down and turned to Rosalie and Felix, who was now standing next to her. "I'm sorry, but I will be unable to work on this movie. I am sure Alice, Marvin, and Jacob will be happy to help, but I am going to be declining the offer."_

_Rosalie looked at me in shock, before turning to Marvin and back to me. "That is not a possibility. Marvin signed a contract stating that all employees of this shop would be at our disposal for the movie and we specifically want you because your work is exactly what we are looking for."_

_I groaned, shot Marvin a look to let him know he may want to sleep with one eye open._

"_Will I be able to do my work without any contact with the actors?" I questioned, hopeful for a positive answer._

"_I'm afraid not. You will be creating quick a few details tattoos for their characters and will need to work with them to make sure the artwork fits exactly it should. Plus, we'll need you to be available during filming to make any corrections or fix anything that gets messed up during shooting." Rosalie answered, obviously feeling like I was not looking forward to this experience at all._

"_Fine. Let's talk about what you want and get everyone out of my shop as soon as possible." I huffed and went to grab my sketch pad. "And is it really necessary to have the entire fucking crew here?" I waved toward the people still standing in my doorway. "I would hate to lose business because of all the freaks blocking the entrance my customers use."_

_After a few minutes, it was decided the crew would not be needed and I was left sitting in our lounge area with Rosalie, Felix, Marvin, Jasper and the douche bag. While we were getting situated, I heard Tanya exclaim loudly that she wanted to get her slit pierced. I knew this was deliberate and she was hoping to get the attention of the 2 actors in the shop, but couldn't help but smile when I saw the bounce in Alice's step as she led Tanya to the back room._

_We discussed the tattoos that would be needed for the characters for the next 2 hours. I would be designing full sleeves for Jasper, along with a back piece and a few random designs for his legs. Asshole would be getting basically a full body tattoo, which meant I would have to spend a ton of time with him and I was pissed. I tried to tell them I thought it would be better if he just had one little tattoo, but they didn't agree with that._

"_So what is this movie about anyway?" I asked to get some ideas on things to include in the tattoos._

"_Well, the main character, Anthony, is a rising rock star. He gets stressed out from his hectic schedule and decides to take some time off. He meets a girl while he is on the break and falls in love with her. He realizes that he loves her too much to allow her to be part of his crazy life and leaves her." Rosalie got all excited about the next part of the story. "After a few months, he realizes his life is nothing without her and decides he needs to be with her, only to find he has no way to contact her. The rest of the movie deals with him trying to find her and the things he does to get her attention."_

"_Does he ever find her?" I was surprised I actually wanted to know the answer. It sounded like a silly little love story, but I was still interested in the outcome._

"_You'll have to go see the movie to find out." Cocksucker answered. I glowered at him, but it seemed that everyone shared the opinion, nobody offering me the answer to my question._

"_Awesome. Are you done here?" I stood, trying to show that I was over the whole thing and looked at Marvin._

"_Um yeah. I'll just take care of getting the timeline set up and I'll get with you about it later." Apparently, Marvin isn't as much of a moron as I make him out to be in my head because he knew not to push me at this point._

"_Oh, hey. Can I talk to you for a second?" Fuckface asked, jumping up from his seat. "I mean, I just want to tell you some ideas I had." He looked around at everyone, obviously checking to see if they noticed how weird he was acting._

"_Five minutes." I turned on my heel and made my way to my office. I wasn't sure what he was planning on saying, but I knew we needed some privacy. I walked straight to my desk upon entering my office and waiting for him to join me. He shut the door and sat in the one of the seats on the opposite side of me._

"_So…" He began._

"_So." I mocked. Really. We fuck, have kids together, which he has never acknowledged and he starts this conversation with 'so'? I rolled my eyes. "Say what you need to say. Clock's ticking."_

"_Um. Okay." He gave me an odd expression that I didn't care enough to evaluate. "I was wondering if we could get together some time." _

"_No." I answered immediately, not needing any time to think about it. I stared at him, watching the shock and confusion on his face as he processed my answer._

"_Oh. Okay." He looked around the room before settling back on me. "I'm confused. Was I the only one that felt that connection?" He asked me, tilting his head to the side. I couldn't control the anger that bubbled up inside of me._

"_Get the fuck out." I pointed to the door and turned to my computer to show him he was dismissed._

_End Flashback_

"I mean, how fucking dare he!" I exclaimed, slamming my hand on the bar. "Thinking he can come back into my life after everything he put me through and expect a booty call." I scoffed. "What an ass."

"Wait!" Alice interrupted my rant by snapping her fingers in my face. "Did you just say what I think you said?"

_Well fuck._

"What do you think I just said?" _Nice job! Always good to answer a question with a question when trying to deflect._

"I think you just said that Edward hotass Cullen is yo' baby daddy." She narrowed her eyes at me.

"No. My twins do not have a father. Check their birth certificate." I replied to her, but saw that she wasn't going to back down. And I could see the lightbulb going off in her head while she thought about the twin's looks and compared to Captain Dick. "But, fine. Yes, he was the sperm donor."

"And by sperm donor, you mean, he injected it himself, right?" She grinned, happy to finally know this part of my story. I had always told her I didn't want to talk about how the twins came about and she was always willing to wait. The wait was finally over for her and I could tell she was ecstatic.

"Yes, we fucked. He left. I tried to tell him about the kids and he ignored all of my letters." I summarized since she knew most of the story anyway.

"Did he mention the kids at all?" Emmett finally joined the conversation.

"No. He only asked about our connection. I was so pissed that he would talk about that and not something like 'how are the kids I helped you conceive'." I reached for a shot glass and was pleased to find that I was not stopped.

Emmett looked to be deep in thought and didn't even try to stop me from taking the bottle of tequila from his hands. _ Success was mine!_

I took a quick shot, not knowing when he would snap out of whatever he was in and saw him began to open his mouth to speak. Unfortunately, he was cut off by someone yelling out his old nickname.

"Glory hole!"

I turned to see Jasper making his way up to the bar, with a few people trailing behind him. Alice mumbled something about wanting to see his pretty peen and Emmett laughed loudly.

"Hey Jazz Hands!" Em reached over the bar and the two did the stupid handshake they made up in high school. "Bella was just telling me that she saw you today." They both looked at me and I just held up my shot glass, hoping they would realize I wasn't in the mood to talk. I had some drinking to do.

"Yeah. It was a huge surprise. I was shocked to find out the girl that passed out at just the mention of needles and blood is now a tattoo artist." Jasper looked at me. "I guess a lot has changed, huh."

"Like you wouldn't believe." I agreed and sighed, then realized my glass was empty and the bottle had been taken away from me again. "What the fuck, Em. This glass must be broken. There is no alcohol in it!" I shoved the shot glass in his face and he shook his head.

"I'm serious this time. No more Bella. You are going to be hurting in the morning." He looked at me pointedly and I knew there was no arguing. I was too tired to argue anyway. I put my head back down on the bar and Alice started stroking my hair.

"Oh hey man. I want to introduce you to my buddy." I heard Jasper talking to someone, who I assumed was Emmett, so I didn't bother lifting my head. That would require too much effort. "Em, this is my good friend Edward Cullen. Edward, this is my best friend from high school, Emmett. And you already met Bella and Alice at the shop." That got me to lift my head up. I glared at the new comer.

"What are you, following me?" I sneered.

"Um." Asshat looked between me and Jasper, then turned his attention to Emmett. "It's nice to meet you." He extended his hand, to which Emmett looked at, but did not reach for. _That's my loyal Em!_

"Yeah." Emmett looked at Fuckface and I could tell he was trying to kill him with his mind. I don't think it was working because it just seemed to make him look at Em like he was crazy.

"Fuck. I gotta pee." I let my lady-like qualities be known to all in a 20 foot radius. I tried to get off the stool, but it seemed to be on some kind of tilt-a-whirl and I couldn't get off the ride. "Alice, help me off this thing. Emmett, I think you need to fix the screws on this thing." I held onto Alice as she carefully got me to my feet.

"Need help in there?" Alice asked, keeping an arm on my shoulder.

"You just want a peak at the kitty." I grinned at her and winked. "Maybe later sweet tits." I waved everyone off and showed them that I could walk perfectly fine and didn't need help. Well, it would have been fine if I didn't run into a chair and table that jumped in front of me.

I did my thing in the bathroom and splashed some water on my face. I was at that perfect point of drinking where I was buzzed, not walking quite right, but still coherent and knew what was happening around me. It's a great feeling.

I just finished up drying my face when the door to the bathroom opened. I turned and saw Angel face. _Well shit that wasn't an insult. Maybe I have had more to drink than I thought. _

"Wrong bathroom. And I know for a fact you are not a woman, so get out of here." I shooed him off, but he didn't budge.

"I don't understand." He looked like he was in pain and I was confused by his mannerisms and the way he looked at me.

"What's there to understand? This is the ladies' room. You are not a lady. Fuck off." I threw my hands up and sighed heavily. _He is really thick._

"That's not what I meant Bella." _MMmmmm…say my name again. Only this time, moan it and include the words Fuck yes. _

_God fucking damn it. I did not just think that._

"I thought you felt it too." He took at step to me and I wanted to scratch my head while pondering what he was talking about.

"You'll have to stop with being cryptic." I responded and took a step back, only to run into the bathroom counter.

He proceeded to slowly walk toward me, until we were chest to chest, or rather chest to eye level and my eyes were so happy about their view.

"We had a connection. I know you felt that. How could you not?" He ran a hand through his hair. "I just need you to tell me I'm not crazy." I sighed. I may hate him, but I couldn't deny that there was a connection between us.

"Of course I felt it." I confirmed, but put a hand up when I saw him start to speak again. "But, it's been a long fucking time and you have done, or I guess not done, too much for that connection to mean anything. And I refuse to be your fuck buddy or some kind of hook up while you are in town."

"That's not what I want, Bella." He huffed.

"What do you want, then?" I asked him, getting irritated that he wasn't getting to the point. He began mumbling something to himself and rubbed the heels of his hands into his eyes.

"I want to feel that connection again." He looked me straight in the eyes. "I need to feel it again."

"I'm sorry. But it's too late. You had your chance." I shook my head and made to walk around him in order to leave. I was halted by a hand on my wrist.

"No." I looked up to see a determined look in his eyes before he turned me to fully face him and crashed his lips to mine.

**A/N: Hi pretty people! **

**Thank you to my lovely beta, smmiskimen, for checking over this chapter and forgiving drunken Bella for her poor grammar/English.  
**

**So, here's the deal**. ** I had not planned on doing EPOV at all for this story. But, there seems to be a bit of a desire to read what he has been up to for all this time. I'm going to leave it up to you guys. Next chapter will be EPOV and may give you guys some answers...if you give me some love and review. And I will guarantee that it will be out before Christmas as my gift to you. So, the ball is in your court. **


	6. Meeting of Doom

**I suck. Sorry for the length of time between updates. I have had this chapter written for a while, but just didn't know if it was right. After re-reading it for the trillionth time, I think I'm happy with it. I am hoping to win some points for the fact that I made the chapter longer, as requested. And the next chapter will be out pretty quickly because it is almost done.**

**Thanks to everyone who PMd me or reached out to me through a review to ask me to update this story. RL has been quite hectic, but I'm trying to keep up.  
**

**So, quick disclaimer that Twilight and all the shit that goes with it is not mine...and now you can read the chapter.**

_Previously…_

"_I'm sorry. But it's too late. You had your chance." I shook my head and made to walk around him in order to leave. I was halted by a hand on my wrist._

"_No." I looked up to see a determined look in his eyes before he turned me to fully face him and crashed his lips to mine._

* * *

Somehow, even in my drunken state, I knew I didn't want this to happen. Okay, so I wanted it to happen. I would be an utter idiot to not want to lock lips with such a stud. But, I didn't want it to happen on his terms, and definitely not after everything he has done to me…or should I say hasn't done. Being there for his kids, for example.

I attempted to push his chest to move away from him, but his arms quickly wrapped around my waist and tightened so I would not be able to leave his enclosure. I began to get pissed that he wouldn't let up when I was obviously not responding. I suddenly figured out an easy way to get him to stop, so I opened my mouth slightly, acting as though I was inviting his tongue into my mouth. Unfortunately for him, the only thing I was inviting was his tongue between my teeth.

"Fucking shit!" He yelled after jumping away from me in shock at the sudden pain of my biting his tongue.

"That's what you fucking get, asshole." I spat at him, turning once again to leave the bathroom as he looked in the mirror with his tongue hanging out of his mouth, inspecting it for damage. "Don't ever do that shit again."

With that, I finally made my way out of the bathroom and hurried back into the main part of the bar. I found everyone still in the same area, chatting and laughing. Emmett, of course, was telling stories of the crazy people he has had in the bar and enjoying his role as the center of attention.

"B! What the fuck took so long? You didn't puke in there, did you?" He yelled over the noise, causing everyone to turn and look at me as I stumbled my way up to them.

"No, I got locked in." Half-truth is always the way to go. "I finally figured out how to get out and here I am."

I looked away from Em's suspicious stare and locked my gaze onto Alice, who was making some creepy flirty faces at Jasper. Jasper seemed to enjoy the attention, but also seemed slightly uncomfortable by Alice. And let's just face it. She makes a lot of people uncomfortable.

"Ali, want to help me walk home?" I called over to her, and noticed Jasper take on a relieved look when her attention was diverted to me.

"Yeah. Let's go sweet tits. And I may even be willing to put out." She winked at me, and then turned back to Jasper. "Don't worry honey dick, I'm going to convince you to let me see that pretty cock of yours one day." Emmett and I both looked at her in shock. Not because of what she said, because that was just an Alice thing to say. But for her to be flirting with a guy was just weird and I swear I heard the Twilight Zone tune in my head.

For the next week, I was successful in my attempts at avoiding Edward. I spent my time with my normal clients and worked with the movie's makeup artists to get a feel for the stencils I would be using for the guys' tattoos. It was a new material I had never worked on before, so they gave me tons of the paper-like material to practice on.

I used Emmett as my test dummy and had fun creating temporary tattoos for him. My favorite was the tramp stamp I did for him claiming I needed to test the material on all parts of the body. He didn't even question what the tattoo was and was slightly pissed at me when he took at look in the mirror and saw and arrow pointing down with "Property of Butch" next to it.

It was actually rather easy to avoid Edward than I thought it would be. I lucked out that he had some press shit to do for a film releasing in a few weeks, so he was forced to go out of town while everyone prepared to begin filming the movie I would be working on.

I thought I would get away with not talking to him about anything non-movie related, but realized that wouldn't be the case when I got a call on a Friday evening.

"Ink Stains. This is Bella." I answer the shop phone.

There was silence on the other line, which instantly pissed me off. We would constantly get calls from frat boys or silly little girls thinking they want to be cool and get a tattoo, then get all shy and scared when it was time to actually talk to us about it. I didn't have time for that shit at the moment. I had a unicorn tattoo I was working on for Em's next test run.

"If this is some asshole getting shy just calling a tattoo shop, you aren't ready to get one. Try again once your balls have finally descended out of that pussy you are currently sporting." I huffed and slammed the phone down, pissed when it seemed to ring again almost immediately.

"What the fuck?" I yelled.

"Um." Was all I heard before silence again.

"Oh for fuck's sake! Seriously?" I realized I almost sounded whiney, but it was really irritating me.

"Bella?" The person finally questioned.

"That's the name I said when I answered the phone the first time, isn't it?" I snapped. "Now that we have established that, what can I help you with?"

"Yeah, sorry." I heard a sigh. "I just wasn't prepared for you to actually answer.

"Um. That's what I usually do when this fancy ringing contraption makes noise." I answer, sarcasm dripping from my voice. "And why would you call a second time knowing I was going to answer and still not be prepared?"

I was greeted with silence again.

"Alright. Listen. As fun and stimulating as this conversation has been, I have clients to take care of. Can you either get to the point of your call or try again some other time? Preferably never." I waited for the caller's decision.

"Bella. This is Edward." He paused.

_Oh._

"Oh." I voiced my thoughts, because apparently that's all my brain was capable of coming up with.

"I'll make this quick because for some reason I'm the last person you want to talk to right now." He didn't give me a chance to deny his statement, and really it would have been a blatant lie on my part to act like I was happy to hear from him. "I want a chance to talk to you. I promise not to try anything. Can we meet when I get back into town and discuss things?"

"There's really nothing to discuss, Edward. You are douchebag. End of story." I stated with a sickeningly sweet tone.

"I have to disagree, Bella." He snapped back at me. "We do have things to discuss."

"So, for the record, you are not disagreeing on the douchebag part of my statement. Correct?" I clarified with a grin.

"Fuck. Will you cut that shit out!" He shouted into the phone.

"Using that tone with me is not the way to get me to agree to talk to you." I countered.

"Sorry." He sighed. "I'm just frustrated and confused and haven't got a clue why you won't let me explain myself." I heard a slight crack in his voice toward the end of his sentence and decided airing things out may be good. It would give me a chance to tell him to fuck off and get him off my back.

"Fine." I conceded.

"Please. All I'm asking for is 5 minutes of your time. Well, maybe ten minutes. I just want to explain why I left and everything that was going on in my life when you…"I cut off his pleading rambling.

"I said fine. Now, tell me when and where. I have shit to do." I practically shouted into the phone.

"Oh! Uh….hmmm. I probably should have thought this through a bit more." I heard paper rustling on his end. "Shit. My assistant hasn't updated my schedule here." He muttered.

"Okay. Do you at least know what day you will be back?" I questioned, really annoyed by his lack of preparation. He really wasn't making a good impression.

"I'm back into town early Monday morning. That's all I know. I think I have a meeting at some point on Monday, but my assistant would know for sure." He was beginning to ramble again.

"How about this. I will be at the shop all day on Monday. I don't have any clients until 2 that afternoon, so if you can come by before then, let me know. If not, well, I guess we'll try for some other time or just write it off that the talk was never meant to happen." I was so done with the phone call and ready to just hang up. I have never been a fan of phones and conversations that drag out make me want to kick things.

"Okay. That works. I'll call you!" I could tell he was smiling by the light, excited tone in his voice. "I will be seeing you on Monday."

"Yep." I hung up, not caring how rude I was. I had shit to do and he should just be happy that I even took the time to talk t him in the first place.

After the call, the rest of the day at the shop was pretty uneventful. I decided to close up early once Alice informed me that Tanya agreed to go on a date with her. Apparently, Tanya was ready to try women after all the bad luck she has had with men and Alice thought she would be a perfect guinea pig for Tanya's lesbian experimentation. Jake, upon finding out about this news, requested the rest of the night off as well so he could follow the two women on their date. Normally I would give him a hard time over his stalker tendencies when it came to Alice, but I was too excited about getting home to the twins and Emmett, so I let it slide.

Saturday arrived and I found myself at the Science Center with the twins, along with Emmett and Alice. Once a month, we all write down a name of a family-friendly place we want to visit or family activity we want to do, place everyone's choices in a hat and draw one. Whatever it says, we do. This time, it was Seth's request to go to the Science Center, much to Leah's dismay.

"Leah, I really think you are overreacting." I gave her my 'mommy look', giving her outfit another look over.

Leah scoffed while smoothing down her black "Science = Death" shirt. Her black pants and black combat boots were her way of letting us all know she was not happy with this month's outing. The outfit was completed with a huge, floppy black hat so no one from school would recognize her and black gloves so her fingers would not be tainted with "nerd germs."

Alice, ever the encourager of such behavior, was in a matching outfit, prancing around the parking lot of the Science Center like a pixie on crack. I was not given the details yet, but her date with Tanya seemed to be a success.

"Mommy." Leah whined. "Being seen here could totally ruin my rep." She stomps her foot when she sees Seth roll his eyes. "Do you have a problem with me not wanting to be bored to death by your nerdiness?"

"Not at all, Sister. I just feel bad that I got both the brains and looks." He smirked at her and I realized in that moment he was quickly becoming an exact replica of his father.

"Enough you two." Emmett clapped his hands together, making them both jump, as well as a family walking past us. "We have dinosaurs and shit to see." He bellowed.

"Emmett! Watch your language asshole!" Alice yelled while covering her own ears.

"I swear, Mother. If we are not scarred by our affiliation with Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum over there, we'll be able to survive anything." Seth stated before walking to the entrance of the Science Center.

Our first stop was to the IMAX theater to watch a film about dinosaurs. Unfortunately, Emmett misunderstood the title "Mating Habits of Dinosaurs" and was asked to leave the theater 10 minutes in when he loudly asked when they would show how dinosaurs 'got it on' and which dinosaur had the biggest penis. Apparently, he was thinking it would be dino-porn instead of the actual topic of relationships between dinosaurs and which dinosaurs mated for life, etc.

Alice was kicked out about 15 minutes after Emmett when she stood on her seat and asked if they were prejudice against gay and lesbian dinosaurs because they had not mentioned them during the show. If that wasn't enough, when she was asked to leave, she huffed and announced "at least I didn't ask how they masturbate, which I am quite curious about." Leah, Seth and I slumped in our seats, in an attempt to make it look like we were not with her.

Now, I am sure you are appalled that I allow this kind of talk in front of my children, so let me explain my thought process a little.

I would rather they learn things from me, and our family, and know that we are always open and honest with them, than for them to learn it from outside sources and think they can't talk to us about it. I don't want to shelter them in any way. Some may think this is bad parenting, but they are welcome to go fuck themselves.

The film ended just a little while after Alice's grand exit, and we quickly left the theater to rejoin our group of delinquents. We found the two of them taunting the alligators in the Florida wildlife exhibit and moved on to try to see the rest of the Center without getting into more trouble. Seth would be pissed if they revoked his annual pass.

The rest of the visit was fun, and we were even able to get up to the observatory at nightfall to see the stars. Seth found the coordinates of the star he bought for me for my last birthday and was so excited to show it to me. It was a lot of fun and I think even Lead enjoyed herself, thought she would never admit it.

Sunday is our relaxing day, so we cleaned up the house and watched movies all day. I helped Leah work on her art while Seth played piano for us. Emmett had to spend the day doing inventory at the bar, so the house was nice and quiet.

Around three, the phone rand and Leah jumped up to answer it. Unfortunately, we were unable to find the receiver anywhere and were forced to let the answering machine pick up.

"Hi Bella. This is Edward." He paused, probably thinking I might pick up. If I knew where the fucking phone was, I would. "I just wanted to let you know I will be able to stop by your shop around eleven tomorrow morning…ummmm…I guess that's all. So, I'll, uh, see you tomorrow." There was a sigh, then a click indicating the call ended and I realized there were two sets of eyes on me.

"Mother?" Seth called from his perch at his piano. "Who is Edward?"

Leah squealed. "Isn't it obvious dodo!?! Mommy has a date!" She bounced and clapped. I made a mental note to cut down on her time with Alice before replying.

"No, Mommy doesn't have a date." I scoffed at the idea. "Edward is no one important, just someone I have to deal with for that movie I told you about."

"Oh." Lead said, dejected. "That stinks."

"Mother." I looked to see Seth giving me a concerned look. "You know we don't mind if you date, right?" Seth asked me, somewhat cautiously.

"I know sweetie. If I meet someone I want to date, you two will be the first to know." I assured him and gave him a wink.

"The first to know what?" I heard from the doorway.

"When Mommy find a stud muffin to love, she's going to tell us." Leah stated excitedly, running back to her art supplies. I started to smile, but stopped when I noticed Emmett's brows furrow and a deep frown mar is sweet face.

"Oh." He looks at me confused. "I didn't realize you were looking." I shake my head at him and gave him a small smile.

"No plans in the immediate future." I assure him and see a hint of a smile appear.

After dinner that night, the kids took their baths and both wanted to go to bed early, saying they were tired. As Leah made her way to my room, she made a comment about Edward coming to see me the next day, which immediately put Em on alert.

"What the fuck does that dickweed want?" He hissed once we got to my room, shutting and locking the door.

"He keeps insisting that we need to talk and I figure that I might as well just give him a few minutes to say this shit and then explain to him that we don't want anything to do with him." I explain calmly.

"This is fucking ridiculous, Bells." He seethes. "You can't get close to him! What if he tries to take the kids?"

"He hasn't even mentioned them, Emmy." I soothe, trying to calm him down, but Papa bear was already being unleashed.

"They are not his kids!" He begins to rant. "I have been here for everything and I am not going to allow that pretty boy to come in here and take my place. We are a family! You are my family! And that does not include him!" He is practically yelling at the end of his speech and I'm a little pissed that he felt the need to tell me those things.

"You think I don't know that?! Fuck Em. I would never allow him to take your place in this family. He gave up his chance to be part of this when he turned his back on me while I was pregnant. You are the only man that has been there for me and my children expecting nothing in return. You give us your all. We wouldn't be a family without you, so don't you dare feel you need to tell me that it doesn't include him." I placed my hand on his shoulder. "I thought you knew us better than that. I definitely thought you knew me better than that."

"I just don't want to lose those kids. They are my life." He tells me solemnly. "You are my life."

"I know, Em. You are just as important to them as they are to you." I squeezed his shoulder and offered him a smile.

"And you?" He questions.

"What?" I ask, confused.

"Am I just as important to you?" He asks, moving closer to me.

"Of course you are." I state with conviction.

"Show me." He says with a smirk and pulls me to him as he backs into my bed. And I did show him how important he is to me…multiple times.

* * *

I woke from a restless sleep on Monday morning and the kids insisted that Emmett take them to school because they didn't want to deal with me while I was so cranky. It may have also had something to do with the fact that I looked like the love child of the Crypt Keeper and Larry King. It was pretty scary.

I took the time alone to get ready for the day. I spent way too much time in the shower, allowing the steaming hot water to pour over me and relax my strained muscles. I couldn't get the overwhelming tension out of my shoulders, but was hopeful it would go away after the talk I would be having with Edward.

The talk. To say I was nervous would be a huge understatement. I was petrified. The truth is that everything Emmett was worried about were the same things I have been festering in the back of my mind since the moment he said hello to me. I didn't want him to come in and decide he wanted to disrupt my family and try to take Emmett's place a father figure.

We were happy and we all functioned well together in our slightly dysfunctional way. It worked for us. And I couldn't allow the "pretty boy" as Em called him, to ruin everything by decided he was ready to play daddy five years too late.

I would just have to make it clear that he is not welcome in our lives. But then again, is that fair to the twins? They never ask about their father, but I know one day they will. I have never lied to them and wouldn't want to start, but I can't imagine they would take it well if I were to tell them they had a chance to know their father but I turned him away. It was all just so confusing and I needed the hours to speed up so I could stop over thinking.

Luckily, after arriving to the shop, I had plenty of work to do to keep my mind off the Meeting of Doom as I have now dubbed it. _Ominous music playing in my head every time I thought the name._ I quickly got to work on the design I was preparing for my 2 o'clock appointment, Alec and Jane, even though they were creepy beyond belief.

In the three years, I have been their tattoo artist, I have never seen either one of them smile. That's not so strange, I guess, but the fact that Jane hisses at people is probably weird. Or maybe it's the way Alec licks the back of his hands and rubs the saliva-coated skin all over his face and makes this odd purring noise when Jane strokes behind his ear while he gets tattooed.

Or what makes them so creepy could be that they have matching tattoos. Now, I have been asked to do plenty of matching tattoos, so that's not the strange part. It's just that every single one of the tattoos I have done for them are matching…in the same location on their bodies…and all have something to do with cats of some kind.

My current design was of two cats playing with a ball of yarn. Sweet right? Well, that is what the picture was that they brought me when we did our consult on what they were wanting. So, they requested a few changes to the design. The cats now have sneers on their faces, baring fangs dripping with blood. The ball of yarn is actually now a ball of intestines.

So, as much as these two freak me the fuck out, there is no way I am saying no to them. For one, it is pretty entertaining to watch the two of them, almost like a Discovery channel special. And two, those scary fucks would probably cast some spell on me if I ever say no to them.

When the clock chimed, letting me know it was time for the Meeting of Doom, I started a pattern of trying to concentrate on my work while looking up at the door every five seconds. _I counted._

Fifteen minutes passed and I was giving him the benefit of the doubt. He may have been bombarded with paparazzi while leaving his hotel or was being following by screaming fans so he stopped for a quick photo and to sign some autographs. Or possibly, his watch was broken and he wasn't good at telling time by the placement of the Sun in the sky.

Those thoughts changed around the 30 minute mark and I began to think maybe he was in an accident. I even thought about calling around to the hospitals in the area to check. I had no doubt that he would show up to the meeting if he was physically able. He badgered me enough to agree to it, so I couldn't imagine him standing me up.

When the clock struck noon, I was pissed. No, pissed is putting it lightly. I was fucking livid and deciding on the manner in which I would inflict pain on him the next time I saw him. He was just further cementing his place in the Douchebag Hall of Fame.

I jumped when the door chime alerted me to someone entering the shop, effectively breaking me out of my daydreams of torturing Edward in the most gruesome ways. Looking up, expecting to see green eyes and bronze hair, I was surprised to see a tall, attractive woman with blonde hair walking through the door. My eyes immediately traveled down to her hand, rubbing her very pregnant belly.

"Sorry. We don't tattoo pregnant women here." I stated harshly. I have many a run in with pregnant women not understanding that I have the right to say no to giving them a tattoo. While there are no reports stating tattoos during pregnancy are bad, I just don't feel right about it. Plus, your skin is all out of proportion during pregnancy, so the work just wouldn't look right in my opinion.

The blonde laughed and gave me a condescending look. "Oh. God, no. I would never get a tattoo. And definitely not from here." She stated with disgust as she looked around my shop.

"So, then what are you here for?" I asked, not hiding my offense at her statement.

"My…Edward requested that I come done here and talk to you." She stated with a somewhat smug look on her face.

"Your Edward?" I questioned, raising my eyebrows.

"Hmmm…." I couldn't tell if she was confirming my question or what, but it was pretty annoying. "Yes." She smirked, before clearing her throat and setting her face straight as she took in my defensive stance, with arms folded across my chest. "Oh, forgive me dear." _Who the fuck is she calling dear?_ "I should introduce myself. My name is Irina." She held her hand out to me, which I promptly ignored.

"Pleasure." I stated dryly. "So, mind telling me why your Edward sent you here when he said he would be the one to be here?" I asked, noticing the slight bitter sound to the tone of my voice.

"Well, you see. Edward has asked me to come here and request that you stay away from him." I opened my mouth to speak, but she put her hand up and continued talking. "Yes, I know he asked you if he could talk to you, but he's just confused right now, what with the baby coming and all." He hand went to her belly to rub again.

"That's his baby?" I asked, stunned. I saw a brief look of what I can only deem as satisfaction flit across her face before she answered.

"Of course it is his. We have been together for seven years, so it was bound to happen sooner or later." She grinned at me.

"Seven years?" I choked out, feeling like she just punched me in the stomach. "But, do you know about my…" She didn't allow me to finish before she scoffed.

"Of course I know all about the little bastards you tricked Edward into making with you." She narrowed her eyes at me as though I had done something wrong. "Edward had a moment of weakness where he felt like slumming it and you came along. Poor man regretted it as soon as it was over and he came running back to me." She grinned at me. "We had a wonderful laugh over your predicament when we received your letters. Seriously, it was funny stuff." She went on a bit more, but I tuned her out because it was taking all my power to restrain myself while chanting in my head that it was not okay to hit a pregnant woman. _I'll just save all my violence up for Edward._

"So, anyway. I'm bored with this conversation. I just came to tell you that Edward is going through a lot right now and is confused about what to do over the whole pregnancy thing. He was just acting out when he saw you. I guess you know from past experience that he isn't thrilled with the whole fatherhood aspect that comes with unprotected sex." Irina giggled and looked at me as though she expected me to agree and join in. _Fat chance psycho._

"After he told me he would be meeting you, we discussed that he needed to step up and be prepared to be a father for this child and not worry about yours since they had already lived without him for so long. Why start now, right?" She smirked like she was saying the funniest thing in the world, and I rolled my eyes. "So he asked me to come down here and talk to you. Explain things and ask that you not tell anyone about the little freaks you call your children." The condescending look was back and she walked toward the door before I could make sense of everything she just said.

"Bye now, Bella. It was great talking to you." She trilled as she sauntered out of the shop.

_What the fuck just happened? Meeting of Doom indeed!_

_

* * *

_**A/N: EPOV next chapter. I would love to hear your thoughts on this chapter and continue to read theories on the whole Edward aspect of this story. Did he get the letters? How many babies is he the 'baby daddy' of? Does the carpet match the drapes?**

**Oh, one more thing. If you aren't reading Dream Like You'll Live Forever by Lozz5159, you need to be. Look it up! It's an fuckhot Mobward with an outspoken Bella. Read it, review it...love it.  
**

**Peace out.  
**


	7. His Side of Things

**Sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out. It was a lot harder to write than I thought it would be. I really hope you like it.**

**A HUGE thank you to wandb and smmiskimen for being kickass beta's for this story. Without their help, this chapter would suck ass.**

**Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine.**

**EPOV**

"And now for something all of our readers want to know…" The girl in front of me paused for what I'm sure she thought was dramatic effect. "What is your shoe size?" If she wasn't asking such a stupid question, I would probably be tempted to flirt with her a little. I was just too irritated by the ridiculous questions she was throwing at me.

I was sure she was expecting me to give her my panty-dropping smile and offer her a place in my list of skanks. I just wasn't feeling it. I had Bella on my mind and no one else would do but her. We have been apart for too long.

Thinking of Bella reminded me of how pissed I was to be asked about my fucking shoe size. This was one of the many questions I received during interviews that made me daydream about slitting my throat and bleeding out all over the person interviewing me. This, along with whether I wore boxers or briefs, was apparently the most interesting thing they could come up with when I was being interviewed by teen magazines. And, really, I had no desire to stoop low enough to put that kind of information and innuendo out there for pre-teens and teens to read.

Stifling a groan, I stated my standard reply to the shoe size question. "They are quite large." With the added wink, the annoying giggling began and I forced myself to not include an eye-roll. These chicks were so easy.

I checked my watch, while the girl looked through her notes to see if she had any additional inane questions to ask me and found that it was well after two o'clock in the afternoon. I immediately wondered how Bella took the news that I was unable to meet with her due to a series of interviews popping up on my calendar at the last minute. I was worried that she would not give me another chance to talk, but thankfully Irina said she would go take care of things for me. I didn't know what I would do without her.

"Okay. So, I just have a couple more questions before we go over to do a quick photo shoot." She looked down at her notes again, before looking up and smiling wickedly at me. "Are you a boxer or brief man?"

_Seriously?! Shoot me now!_

Thirty painfully annoying minutes later, I was finished up with my interviews and thankful to see my lovely assistant rush through the door. I couldn't help but smile as a very pregnant Irina waddled over to me with a tense expression on her face. I easily removed the tension by reaching out to give her ever expanding belly a gentle rub, acknowledging the baby.

"Come on Edward. We have to be over at the studio for a meeting with the director in less than twenty minutes. I have your Quad Venti Café Mocha in the car and the driver is waiting right outside the door for you." She grabbed my arm and began to tug on me. I marveled at how good she was at her job and that she always kept me on schedule.

As soon as we were situated in the car, and the driver pulled out on the way to the studio, I took a hefty gulp of my mocha. With the interviews today being so unplanned, I hadn't had my caffeine fix for the day and I was already feeling the withdrawal headache.

"So, how were the interviews?" Irina began her typical post-interview small talk.

"Same fucking questions, different fucking magazine. I really wish they would come up with some more interesting fucking questions. And, here's a fucking thought, ask about my fucking career and movies," I huffed, still annoyed that I was subjected to that idiocy.

"Nice. You said 'fucking' five times during your little rant. Feel better?" I shook my head, so she continued. "I saw they gave you a brunette. I'm sure she would be more than willing to help relieve your tension." She snickered when I shot her a look.

"Are you kidding? She was too annoying to even think about it. Plus, now that I know where Bella is, I don't have to do that anymore," I explained.

It was common knowledge in the tabloid community that I had a thing for brunettes. What no one realized was that it was my way of trying to get Bella out of my system. Unfortunately, nothing ever came of any of my so-called conquests and I was very rarely able to follow through. Where the world thought I was a bit of a womanizer, I had been practically celibate since my night with Bella. And let me tell you, that wasn't exactly easy when I had women constantly throwing themselves at me.

"So, enough stalling. Tell me how everything went." I was becoming impatient and wanted to find out what Bella said about my absence today.

"Um" Irina began to look at her nails as though she was bored. It was common knowledge she wasn't a fan of Bella, but I never figured out why. "She was pretty pissed and I doubt she'll be willing to talk to you again anytime soon."

"What? Why?" I couldn't believe Bella would be pissed at me because of a schedule I had no control over. I could understand her hesitance at first, but I had a busy schedule. I assumed she'd be okay with Irina's explanation. She had to know after how persistent I was about meeting her that I would have been there if I could. It was frustrating to no end that she wouldn't even give me a chance.

"I don't know. She was being a huge bitch and basically threw me out of her shop." Irina put her face in her hands and began to sniff. Her pregnancy caused her emotions to run all over the place and Bella treating her like shit wasn't helping. I moved closer to her and placed my arm around her shoulder to comfort her.

"I'm sorry I let you go there. I wish I could tell you why she felt the need to be so rude to you" I said softly while rubbing her shoulder gently.

"It's okay. I just think you should steer clear of her from now on," she mumbled through her hands, and sniffling again.

"I'll talk to her and tell her that I'd appreciate it if she directed all future vitriol at me instead of you. That is, if she gives me a chance. I'm so sorry ." Irina knew none of it was directed to her, but I still felt badly about it. I had no intention of staying away from Bella, but being rude to my staff was completely unnecessary. It was one thing to hate me, but Irina had done nothing to her and didn't deserve that kind of treatment. She had been my personal assistant for years, as well as my friend, and I couldn't help but be protective of her.

"I'm serious, Edward," she pushed.

"Look, I'm sorry I got you involved, but I really don't want to discuss it anymore," I huffed in annoyance. "Just tell me what we have for the rest of the day, so I can relax. "

We went over my schedule for the remainder of the afternoon, which luckily was just the meeting with the director. I began counting down the minutes until I would be free for the night.

The meeting with the director went longer than planned, so we didn't get back to my hotel until seven o'clock in the evening. Irina and I ended up heading straight to the hotel, deciding to just grab a quick bite to eat in the lobby cafe as we discussed my upcoming schedule before she retired to her room for the night. Somehow, it had not been leaked yet that I was in town for the movie, so it was nice to eat in peace without worrying about paparazzi bothering me.

I felt like I at least owed Bella a call or something, but it was too late for a casual call and I didn't want to bother her. Still, I hoped she knew that I wasn't trying to avoid her today; it had just been such a long day. I seriously needed to relax and blow off some steam.

I walked Irina to the elevator bank and waited with her for one to arrive.

"Are you sure you don't want to just come up and watch a movie with me?" Irina pushed. She hated when I went out alone. It was one of the few things we argued about, but I think she knew I needed it tonight, so she wasn't pushing as much as she typically did.

"No, I really need to get out. I promise not to do anything stupid." I held up my hand, with three fingers extended, channeling my inner boy scout.

"Don't give me that shit, Edward. You were never a boy scout, and I know you better than you think I do." I flashed her the grin that I knew she loved just as the ding sounded, alerting us that the elevator had just arrived.

After reassuring Irina over and over again that I wouldn't do anything stupid, I bid her goodnight and found a car waiting for me right outside the door. I smiled, knowing Irina had set it up for me, knowing my needs without me voicing them. I made a mental note to give her a raise and jumped in the silver Audi R8.

_Okay. Now what?_

I vacillated between going to confront Bella for being so rude to my assistant and heading to a club to get laid for the night. _I bet I could call the chick that interviewed me earlier and be balls deep in her in less than a minute_. If I was being honest with myself, my frustration toward Bella wasn't because she had been rude to Irina, but because she was shutting me out.

I was completely aggravated that Bella refused to let me explain why I left after my night with her. I had to practically force her to agree to meet with me today. Frankly, I wasn't used to having to work this hard and finding some skank to spend time with wasn't really something I should be doing if I wanted to get Bella to ever talk to me again.

I pulled the car over when I found a small park that looked like a good place to think. I had been so busy lately and never had a chance to be alone, so I was dying for some time to just go over everything that had happened in the time since I'd seen Bella last and what I wanted to happen in the future.

_Flashback_

_I walked into a bar aptly named Bar, thinking it would be a nice way to let loose for the night and get away from my life for a bit. Just as I sat down, I heard the bartender muttering while messing with the liquor bottles. I let out a chuckle when I heard "motherfucking-tittie-cunt-douche" and was slightly surprised by the response that got me._

"_Something funny assfuck?" I immediately stopped my laughter, in shock that someone had actually talked to me like that. Of course, she had not turned around and obviously didn't know who I was. I cleared my throat to get her to turn so I could ask for a drink. When she finally did turn, it was quite obvious she had plastered a ridiculously fake smile on her face._

"_How may I help you sir?" she asked sweetly and I couldn't help but laugh again. Her anger was too cute. _

_She stared at me in silence and I realized she was probably waiting for an apology from me, so I quickly explained that I was having a bad day and just tired, so things seemed funny to me when, in reality, they probably were not that funny._

_As soon as I finished speaking, she shook her head and I thought she was going to refuse my apology. I quickly asked for her name, thinking maybe if I chatted her up a little, she wouldn't ask me to leave._

"_Bella." I finally took the time to look her over and found that she was quite possibly the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. It was a different beauty from what I was used to seeing in LA. She was natural and real. I was intrigued. I was seconds away from saying some cheesy line about her name being perfect for her, but she stopped me before I could speak by asking for my name._

_I was stunned and couldn't tell if she was being serious, but it seemed that she genuinely had no clue as to who I was, which didn't happen that often. I decided to just go with the hope that she didn't know anything about me. It was a refreshing thought that I could just be Edward for the night._

"_Edward," I stated, and watched her intently to see if she would figure it out. No light bulb went off and I mentally fist-pumped that I would have a chance at a normal night for once. And with a beautiful girl at that._

_Two hours later, a few shared shots, and many inane questions like "what's your favorite color" later, I found myself waiting for Bella to lock up the bar before I walked her back to her apartment. I explained that I was in town for business and she didn't ask me to expand on that, for which I was thankful. She seemed to decide that since her apartment was closer, we could go there to hang out, which I was hoping really meant fuck like bunnies._

_Once we arrived at her apartment building, she attacked me and I was pretty sure I was undressed before we even reached her apartment door. This was probably not a good thing since anyone could have taken a picture of us, but I wasn't really thinking about anything other than Bella at that moment. Before the front door was even closed all the way, Bella was on her knees, her warm, wet mouth surrounding my cock. _

_I was so overwhelmed by the intense feeling of her mouth doing wonderful things to me, as well as quite impressed with her skill, that I came quick quickly. I would have been embarrassed, but the girl had skills, so it wasn'tmy fault that she was able to make me come so fast. I practically petted her as she eagerly swallowed everything I gave her and forced myself to not tell her what a good girl she was._

_After that, things got hazy in my mind. I remembered rushing to her bedroom, sliding my tongue along her ridiculously wet folds, and many curses coming from her beautiful lips. The rest of the evening consisted of frantic fucking and affectionate kisses, ending with sweet cuddling._

_End Flashback_

I truly wished I could remember everything about that evening because I'd been chasing it ever since then. What I did remember was the overall feeling that I was home. When I was with Bella, no matter how brief it had been, I felt I was where I always belonged and needed to stay. There was an immediate connection and it only intensified with our physical intimacy.

_Flashback_

_Unfortunately, it didn't take long for my life and celebrity status to catch up with me that night. About three hours after we fell asleep in each others' arms, my phone began to ring. Upon answering, I was confronted by Irina's shrieks that I needed to get out of the apartment as soon as possible. She had just received word that there were pictures floating around of me leaving Bar with Bella, although her face was not easily recognizable from the angle of the photo. A car was already waiting for me in the underground garage of Bella's apartment building and she had received word there was no one in the area to catch me leaving._

_I knew I didn't have much time before the front of the apartment building would be inundated with paparazzi, so I attempted to wake Bella and let her know I had to leave. I didn't know how to explain my sudden departure to my bedmate because we had successfully skirted around the issue all night of me being a celebrity. After multiple attempts at rousing the sleeping beauty next to me, my phone rang again._

"_What?" I snapped._

"_Get your ass down into the car right this second!" Irina yelled into the phone._

"_Hold the fuck on. I want to let her know that I am leaving and…" I was cut off by her impression of a crazed banshee._

"_No, you hold the fuck on. You have exactly two minutes to get downstairs and into the car that is waiting for you. Leave her a fucking note and tell her it was fun, but you had to jet," she huffed into the phone, clearly annoyed that I wasn't rushing out the door with no questions asked. "I've given you enough time to get your fuck on, so now it is time to go."_

"_I don't want to just leave a note! That would make it seem like too much like a blow-off. How suspicious would it be if I just happened to leave while she was sleeping? Just, give me a minute to wake her up and let her know that I'll be in touch," I pleaded with Irina. It amazed me that I felt the need to justify my life with her and beg her for her permission on things, but she did a great job at keeping me out of the media, so I couldn't be mad at her._

"_No!" She yelled. "Listen. I will make sure she gets a message that you didn't want to leave her, but responsibilities got in the way. I'll give her every possible way to contact you and ask that she does so as soon as possible. I'll even tell her how you were being such a fucking pansy-ass mother fucker about leaving her while she was sleeping."_

"_Um…okay. I guess that'll work," I conceded, looking down at the still sleeping Bella. I was quite shocked she was able to sleep through this conversation._

_Walking out of that apartment was the hardest thing I had ever done, but I had to hope that Bella would get the message and call me as soon as she could._

_End Flashback_

I was snapped out of my memories when a light flashed through my window. I was informed by a security guard that the park was closed for the night and asked to leave the premises. My mind was all jumbled from my reminiscing, along with seeing Bella again and feeling such hostility from her, so I decided I needed to go grab a drink.

I walked into Bar after my car decided to go there without me actually realizing it and heard someone doing a very poor rendition of Violent Femmes _Blister in the Sun_, so I figured I was unlucky enough to come on karaoke night. _Lovely. _I tried to block out the horribly off-key notes and found a dimly lit table, plopping myself down. I kept my head down as I ordered a couple beers from the waitress that greeted me.

"Hey man." I looked up to see Jasper standing next to my table, with an oversized cowboy hat covering his face. "Mind if I join you?" I shook my head and gestured for him to take a seat across from me.

"What are you doing here?" I questioned, welcoming the thought of a conversation that didn't revolve around Bella.

"Just wanted to get out and check out some of the talent around here." He grinned and I knew just the type of talent he was looking for. Where my womanizer reputation was based solely on rumors and not true, Jasper's was completely true and he was beyond proud of it.

"Any luck with that?" I chuckled at the smirk that found its way to his face in response to my question.

"Fuck yeah." He tilted his head toward the bar and I followed his gaze to see a tall blonde chick wrapped around a short woman.

"Uh, Jas. I'm thinking they aren't really looking for a good time of the male persuasion." I tried to point out the obvious to my friend, but his smirk became more pronounced at my comment.

"You would think. But, apparently, the blondie is just starting out with the whole twat loving thing and the shortie has been trying to get all over my junk since we met." He chuckled and shook his head, obviously recalling something. "She even told me she is a carpet muncher, but wanted to take my cock for a spin. That's a direct quote, by the way."

"She sounds like your soulmate, my friend." I grinned and looked back over to the girls, who were now in trying to eat each others' faces off. A quick glance around the bar made it clear that every other male in the room was watching their interaction quite intently as well. At that moment, the person butchering Violent Femmes moved to _Add It Up_ and I barely contained the laughter that threatened to bubble up over the choice in song. I tried to get a better view of the stage to see who this person was who apparently only knew Violent Femmes, but my angle wasn't good enough to get a glimpse.

"Yeah, can you imagine me with a broad that loves pussy just as much as I do?" I was always surprised by Jasper's crassness. His gentlemanly ways in public belied his truly crude nature. He was quite a dichotomy. He raised his arms and I began to motion for someone to come to us. I tilted my head down to make sure the person did not recognize me, even though it would be easy to figure out when they got closer and saw me with Jasper. We were often seen together.

"Hey, ladies. Would you like to join me and my buddy?" I snorted at Jasper's now husky voice.

"Cut the shit, loverboy. You already know you are going to be getting into at least one of us tonight," a slightly high-pitched voice stated with attitude. I knew, from the little time I had spent at Bella's shop, that the person behind the voice was Alice. "We'll deal with you and your hopefully impressive junk later. But, right now, I'm only here to tell this asshole he's on my shit list." I felt a smack on the back of my head and looked up quickly to see my attacker.

"What the fuck was that for?" I exclaimed.

"I'm really shocked that you have the audacity to show up here. Your balls must be huge." She glared at me, crossing her arms over her chest.

"What the fuck? I just came here to get away from things for a while, little one." I rolled my eyes and shook my head at her anger.

"You aren't welcome here. Not after the shit you pulled today." She stomped her foot, and if I wasn't slightly scared of the look of fury in her eyes, I may have laughed. "I can't wait to tell Emmett you are here. Those big ole' balls you are sporting will be pulled off and shoved down your throat faster than you can say,'I'm an asshat'!"

"Why is everyone fucking pissed at me?" I exclaimed, throwing my hands in the air. Alice shoved Jasper over and pulled the blonde chick - who I noticed was just standing behind Alice, staring at Jasper – down into the booth with her.

"Well, allow me to clue you the fuck in, Einstein. Bella told me about her little confrontation with Irina. You really are a piece of shit, you know that?" She narrowed her eyes at me, leaning across the table directly in my face.

"I don't control my schedule. I couldn't control what happened today," I attempted to explain. "Irina and I talked it over, and it made more sense for her to go talk to Bella and let her know what was going on. That way Bella wouldn't be left in the dark." I kept my voice level low, trying to remain calm.

"Yeah, well," she huffed and I could tell the wheels were spinning inn her head before she returned to her glare from earlier. "What a way to tell her about the baby."

"I didn't really think it was something I needed to tell her. She was bound to see Irina eventually and see that she is pregnant," I said, but then realized it made no sense that she even brought that up. "Although, I don't understand what that has to do with anything."

She scoffed and looked over to the blonde chick, then to Jasper, and finally to me, breathing heavily.

"I am so fucking close to jumping over this table and strangling you right now. You are the lowest of low. How can you act like it's no big deal that you broke the news to Bella about your fucking love child in that way?!" She screeched at me, pointing a skinny little finger at me.

"What love child?" I was thoroughly confused.

"Okay, so maybe that was the wrong term. That would imply that you have something resembling feelings for the person you impregnated. Maybe I should have said 'demon spawn' instead." She sneered at me and I was truly fearful for my life at this point. I was waiting for her head to begin to spin and pea soup to spew from her mouth.

"Wait! What?" I finally caught onto what she was saying and couldn't stop the shudder that ran through me. "Irina's not having _my_ kid. Why the fuck would you think that?"

Jasper, finally catching on to everything – once he got his eyes off blondie's overflowing cleavage – began to laugh uncontrollably. "Irina…." snort "baby daddy…" snort snort "funniest shit ever."

"If you don't stop that fucking laughing right this second, you won't be tasting pussy tonight." Alice turned to Jasper, who sobered up quite quickly and looked at me apologetically. I shrugged, knowing sex was more important than me. Satisfied that Jasper was no longer finding the situation funny, Alice turned back to me. "Now, what the fuck do you mean that she is not having your kid?"

"Just that." I spoke slowly, as though I was talking to a child…and by her height, it made sense. "I would never touch Irina in that way. She's like a little sister to me. Plus, she's been fucking my agent since before she was even my assistant."

"Back the truck up!" Alice waved her hand in the air. "She's your assistant?"

"Yes. Has been for over six years now," I explained.

I watched as Alice let everything sink in and listened to the ending notes of _Gone Daddy Gone_ coming from the stage.

_Seriously, someone needs to teach this person something other than Violent Femmes._

"Oh fuck. You need to get out of here right now!" Alice exclaimed, jumping up and tugging on my arm.

"Woah. Why?" I wasn't ready to leave, still not sure what was going on and wanting to talk to Alice a bit more, even though I was pretty sure she was going to kill me in the most gruesome way possible .

"Emmett just got finished with his set and is going to be coming this way soon." She rushed out while still trying to pull me from the booth. "If he sees you, he'll kill you for sure." She seemed legitimately worried that he would kill me, but I figured it had more to do with the fact that she didn't want anyone else to have that honor than anything else.

"Um. Okay." I pulled some money out of my wallet and threw it on the table before standing up and nodding to Jasper and the blonde, who were both looking as confused as I felt.

"Oh, and just so you know. The last client at the shop should be gone by now. I hate it when Bella is there all alone." She winked at me and I felt as if I had fallen into the _Twilight Zone_.

I stumbled out of Bar, trying to figure out what just happened with Alice. First, I thought she was going to murder me, then she began to talk about me being the father of Irina's baby, and finally she saved me from an angry Emmett. My mind was jumbled, but there was one thing I knew. I needed to go talk to Bella.

I drove to Bella's shop and sat in my car for a bit, watching her through the window. She was absolutely beautiful, with her hair pulled back away from her face, bent over the front counter. After watching her for a few minutes, I steeled myself that it was time to talk to her. Before I could change my mind, I jumped out of the car, and practically sprinted toward the shop.

I opened the door slowly and held my breath, not sure what was about to happen.

"Sorry, we are just about to close, but I can probably set you up with an appointment tomorrow," she said without looking up from what she was working on, pencil moving quickly across the paper.

"Well, actually, I had an appointment earlier that I couldn't make. So, I'm hoping you could fit me in now," I said smoothly, trying to sound much more calm and collected than I felt. My heart was beating a mile a minute and I found it hard to breath, especially once she snapped her head up and stared at me.

"Nope. Definitely don't have time for you. Please leave," she stated, quite calmly.

_How does she do it?_

"No." I held my ground and leveled my gaze at her.

We stared at each other for a little while, neither wanting to back down. I knew I needed to just start the conversation and get things going, but had no clue where to even begin. So, I went with the first thing that came to my mind.

"Why didn't you call me?" I blurted out. I watched as confusion briefly crossed her face, before she settled on anger.

"ME?!" she yelled. "Call YOU?!" She strode over to me and began to poke her finger in my chest. "You have some fucking nerve, considering all of my letters. I had to fucking research just to find you, and let me tell you, it wasn't easy. I am still paying off that fucking paparazzi guy with tattoos for all the work he put into getting that information for me. I mean, it wasn't like I was just sending you letters to be your pen pal and shoot the shit. They are your fucking kids, Edward, and you did nothing!" She finished her rant, and her breathing was so heavy I feared she would pass out.

I took a second to dissect her words when I realized exactly what she had said. _Letters? Kids?_

"What the hell are you talking about? I don't know anything about any letters and I sure as shit don't know about any kids."

**A/N: I would love to hear your thoughts...**

**And please take a moment to check out the stories written by my lovely beta's. wandb and smmiskimen have some great stories out there in fanfiction-land. Check them out in my Favorite Authors.**


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